Meeting new people can be a challenge, especially if you suffer from social phobia or anxiety. If you feel nervous when faced with the prospect of having to introduce yourself in an unfamiliar situation or talk about yourself with strangers, you're not alone. In addition, introverted personality types usually suffer from difficulties with meeting new people more than extroverts. Introverts are more easily drained by social encounters, according to the article "Introversion" in Psychology Today. Fortunately, there are a few steps that make the process of meeting new people more enjoyable.
Step 1
Encourage yourself with a positive pep talk. This can help to boost your self esteem and make you feel more confident. Many times, people who are afraid of meeting people or suffer from social phobia use negative self-talk to the extent that they become extremely nervous. This can make them unable to function, and they may avoid these types of situations altogether.
The Mayo Clinic says that it's not easy for people to make new friends. Keep in mind that this is true for many people, not only for those who are anxious. While not every interaction will be pleasurable, remember that meeting new people can potentially enrich your life. It can provide meaningful interaction and a sense of connection to others.
Step 2
Visualize a positive outcome. Imagine every detail of the situation, including where the encounter will take place, what you will be wearing and who else will be present. Mentally see yourself acting confident, relaxed and in control. Visualization is a powerful tool for combating anxiety and social phobia. An article, "Seeing is Believing: The Power of Visualization," in Psychology Today points out that mental rehearsal is almost as effective as doing the act itself. Many top athletes and chess players use visualization to help them win. If this technique works for top athletes and chess players, it can work for you too. When visualizing, remember to breathe deeply and keep your body relaxed, as tension and strain will only cause you to feel more anxious and stressed.
Step 3
Learn to act. When you're meeting new people, pretend you're an actor and act the part of someone who is friendly, confident, relaxed and approachable. Remember the famous quote by William James, "If you want a quality, act as if you already had it." Psychologists and psychotherapists encourage their clients to use this technique when confronted with situations that make them feel anxious. Though it might feel inauthentic at first, using this technique will trick your mind into believing you really do feel confident and comfortable.
Step 4
Rehearse what you want to say beforehand. Whether you are going into a business meeting or a social gathering, mentally prepare with things to talk about. Think of how you want to introduce yourself. Remember that most people enjoy talking about themselves, so if you start feeling tongue-tied, try to ask the other person some questions to engage them in the conversation. Some safe topics to keep in mind include basic questions about the type of work someone does, topics in the news or local events and weather.
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