Jealousy results as a natural inclination to protect the loss of a significant relationship, usually from a potential threat. Jealous behavior does not intend to be irrational; however, it may express itself in unhealthy forms, such as belittling, assaulting, restricting one's partner of freedom and being overly possessive. To prevent any harm to your relationship, jealousy should be controlled before it grows out of hand.
Security
Jealousy often results out of feelings of insecurity and unworthiness. You may feel that your partner deserves better and can do better than you, or that you do not provide enough to the relationship. To shed yourself of these feelings, you will need to build confidence and improve your attractiveness. The surer you are of yourself and your self-worth, the less you will worry about losing your partner, and the less often you will display jealous behavior.
Communication
Be honest to your partner if you worry that he may find someone better than you. He can build up your security by promising otherwise and carrying out actions to support his claim. If you are upset by how he acts around others, then explain that to him without growing angry or depriving him of his freedom of expression. Your partner may be more likely to change his behavior the less assertively you make your requests.
Positive Thinking
Rather than convincing yourself that your partner will leave you or cheat on you, focus on everything that says your relationship is going well. Just as you can persuade your brain to worry, you can tell it to calm down.
Relaxation Techniques
In a May 1, 1992, article on romantic jealousy in "Psychology Today," the authors suggest using desensitization techniques to remove the urge of exhibiting jealous behaviors. Start by listing the five things that cause you to be most jealous around your partner. Then imagine the easiest situation involving jealousy while practicing a relaxation exercise like deep breathing. As you learn to remain calm despite greater triggers of jealousy, you can have your partner engage in a mildly jealous-inducing activity, like dressing provocatively in front of others, and practice your relaxation methods in real life.
Accept the Past and Move On
Sometimes jealousy arises as a result of negative relationships in the past. Concentrate on the differences between your current relationship and your past relationships. Acknowledge that your partner is different than your previous partners, and unless he gives you a reason to doubt him, place your faith in his hands. Once you realize your jealousy does not help your relationship, you will experience it less often.
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