Fluctuating hormones, high-school cliques and learning how to be comfortable with yourself can make the teenage years challenging. When your friends do something stupid, when your parents ground you for an unfair reason or when you don't make the school soccer team, you can become so angry that you don't know how to deal with your feelings. Learning how to manage angry feelings can help ease the process of becoming an adult.
Take Three
When you're tempted to flare up, take a mental break by forcing yourself to come up with three options to deal with the situation that's making you mad. For instance, if your mom says you must finish your homework on Friday night instead of going to a football game, come up with three responses to the situation, such as asking if you can do your homework first thing Saturday morning, sneaking out to the game or having a fight with your mom. Mentally evaluate each option to determine which one is likely to result in the outcome you want. Often, coming up with three plans of action makes it clear that getting mad isn't going to help resolve the situation.
Channel Your Inner Calm
Use quick relaxation techniques when you feel anger bubbling inside. Practice slow, steady breathing; mentally repeat a word or phrase, such as "Calm down" or "I am just going to breathe in and out." Systematically tighten and relax muscles in your body, such as the ones in your back and shoulders. Or close your eyes and imagine the sights and sounds of your favorite place. You may have to try several different techniques to pinpoint the one that helps control your anger; once you find a method that works, you'll have an effective way to chill out when necessary.
Find a Creative Outlet
It might sound silly, but writing down your feelings--or drawing, dancing or sculpting them--can help you deal with them more effectively. Channeling your anger into creative pursuits can be a useful way to deal with what rankles you and won't seem to go away, such as a fight with your girlfriend, a bad break-up or a problem with your parents. Use your feelings to inspire creativity; you don't have to be a great artist for this method to work. It's more about expressing your feelings than about creating great art.
