If you were the victim of a verbally or physically abusive relationship, it can take several weeks or months before you regain self worth and happiness. Abusers can make you feel worthless, hurt you with their mean words or scar you with their hands. The American Psychological Association states that women of abuse often have feelings of depression, anxiety, and self-esteem issues. Once you finally find a way out of the relationship, the healing process begins. Learning some of the steps to take in recovery will help you succeed independently.
Support
One of the most important parts of your recovery should be support from family and friends. Turn to them when you feel lonely or lost. They will be there to listen to you and help guide you through dark times. If you left an abusive relationship and you have to support yourself and your children financially, your family and friends may help you with child care. Friends may also give you a temporary place to stay that is safe and free from the abusive control of your ex-partner.
Counseling
Many victims of relationship abuse also have post traumatic stress syndrome. Help Guide states that someone who has witnessed physical or mental abuse may suffer from lingering consequences related to an event. Getting professional help is necessary. Counseling is another important step in recovery. A licensed therapist or counselor can analyze your situation and decide on the best course of treatment. Your therapist may schedule weekly or as-needed counseling sessions, or he may recommend that you attend a group therapy session. This depends on how you respond to the initial counseling session and if there is any post traumatic stress.
Hobbies
Most people involved in a long-term abusive relationship lose track of themselves along the way. Many abusers isolate their victims and damage their self worth as a way to issue control. It is important to find a new hobby that will give you self worth and accomplishment during the recovery process. Hobbies may include something you once did before you began your relationship, or you may wish to try something new. Horseback riding, jogging, archery, doll making and card games are some of the options to explore.
Re-evaluating life goals
Psychology Today illustrates that many victims lose their identity after being in an abusive relationship. Now may be the time to re-evaluate your life goals and what direction you want to go. The goals you may have had before that involved your partner and your future together are over, and you have to focus on what you need to do to keep yourself happy and be successful. Providing an independent future for yourself may include furthering your education or changing careers. You may choose to lead a healthier lifestyle, especially if you are a single parent, so you can be active with your children.
Dating
Recovery From Abuse states that letting go and moving on is one of the final stages of recovery. You will be the only one to decide the right time to date again. It is important to give yourself time to heal after an abusive relationship. Jumping into to a new relationship may not be healthy. You may end up finding someone with the same characteristics as your abusive ex. If you have been in a loveless relationship for years, you may feel like you want to seek attention and love right away. Give yourself time to heal emotionally before you make a quick decision to be with someone else. This will assure you are making rational decisions not based on left over feelings.
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