The University of Northern Iowa defines interpersonal communication as "communicating 'one on one' with other human beings" and describes successful communication as including the ability to predict "how the other person will understand and react to you." Interpersonal communication contains nonverbal cues, including body language and eye contact, and verbal cues, including language and emotional tone. Several approaches can be taken to improve your interpersonal communication, whether you are dealing with family, friends, co-workers or strangers.
Think About the Mood You Set
A simple "hello" can reflect your mood and attitude. When you talk to someone on the telephone, you know what the other person's attitude or mood is by the inflection in his voice, not just by his words. Think about how your voice reflects your attitude towards your audience. Think about the words you choose. You will alienate your audience if you are rude or use inappropriate language.
An effective way to improve your verbal communication skills is to practice, recording yourself digitally on a device such as a cell phone. Play back your recording and listen carefully to how you sound. Does it match how you feel? Is it appropriate for the feelings you are trying to convey?
Improve your Listening Skills
There are four key elements in the listening process: hearing, interpreting, evaluating and responding to the message. All four elements work together to build an understanding of what you are hearing.
The 2005 book "Are You Really Listening?" suggests you ask these questions as you listen. What am I hearing? What feelings am I hearing? What is the message? What is the information that I am hearing? Once you understand the meaning of the message, you can engage in effective interpersonal communication.
Use Appropriate Body Language
Appropriate body language can reinforce your verbal message or reflect your mood. There are some conscious methods you can utilize to show the listener you are actively listening.
When someone is speaking to you, be aware of your facial expressions. Smiling, for instance, will reveal to your listener that you are pleased. Avoid showing unconscious signs of disapproval, such as crossing your arms in front of you. A simple nod of the head shows approval.
Acknowledge Your Audience
Acknowledging your audience is one of the principle techniques of effective interpersonal communication. The person you communicate with needs to know he is understood.
Make eye contact with the speaker throughout the conversation. Ask questions to prove you are listening and for clarification. If you don't have specific questions, you can paraphrase what you heard back to your listener.
References
- University of Northern Iowa: Interpersonal Communication
- "The Business of Listening"; Diana Bonet; 2001
- "Are You Really Listening?"; Paul J. Donoghue, Ph.D., and Mary E. Siegel, Ph.D.; 2005
- "Body Language 101"; David Lambert; 2008
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