No family is the picture-perfect depiction seen on television commercials. Real families have real conflict, which leads to stress in the home. A stressed-out family usually has more arguments and troubles relating. For greater peace and unity, acknowledge the cause of any stressor in your lives and deal with it instead of telling yourself that the problem will go away. If necessary, take advantage of family counseling.
Work Conflicts and Scheduling
Most families are busy these days. Mom and Dad have work schedules to coordinate. Children have soccer games, choir practices and homework that requires help. There's shopping to do, laundry, and when does the house ever get cleaned? Stretching your lives in so many directions can leave you will little time and energy to spend as a family. The Clemson University Cooperative Extension Service advises making that time and cutting back the extracurriculars as a way to relieve stress at home.
Struggle for Independence
As your children age, they look for more opportunities to gain independence. As a parent, you might be less than enthusiastic about letting your 16-year-old daughter take the car on a Friday night or allowing your 9-year-old son attend a sleepover. But just saying no has repercussions, as older children and adolescents may resent limits that seem to make no sense. This may yield an argumentative child or one who sneaks to get her way, creating even more stress in the home. To minimize conflicts, parents need to establish both limits and liberties for their children, remaining vigilant and rewarding young ones for good behavior.
Change
Change, such as a new child, a loss, a move to a new area or a change in finances, can make your family stressed out, confused and insecure. Even changes that are for the better can cause stress, says the American Academy of Family Physicians. Whenever possible, introduce change slowly and let your children know what will be different so that they feel informed and can better prepare. When that's not possible, assure your children that the family will cope with its newest change, as it has in the past.
Finances
Finances are a common source of family stress. Feeling as though you don't have enough money, living paycheck to paycheck or downgrading from a higher paycheck can make you nervous about the future. It's no wonder--the U.S. Department of Agriculture estimates that it takes nearly $16,000 per year to raise a child. If your financial condition has changed significantly, discuss the situation with your children, and if you're so inclined, share the numbers with them.
