Self esteem can be very volatile during adolescence. This can be a turbulent time where children develop physically at different rates. Much of a teenager's self esteem can be influenced by performance in school and his relation to other children. What some parents don't realize is that the adults in a teenager's life also play a significant role and can easily damage a child's self esteem. Fortunately, adults can also help foster a healthy self esteem in their child.
Make Lists
Sit down with your child and encourage him to make lists that will promote positive thinking. You can choose to do this together, or let him keep his lists in a private journal so that he can feel safe to answer honestly. Examples include a list of five strengths, five things you admire about yourself, five greatest moments in life, 20 things you can do, 10 ways you can help people and so on. The purpose of this activity is to get your child thinking positively about himself.
Make a Collage
Collages are fun and crafty, and they can help a teenager identifying characteristics or things about herself that help define who she is. These can range from words that describe her to pictures of her favorite musical band. She should also focus on pasting onto the collage people she admires, examples of careers she might like, activities she is good at and so on. The collage should be put on display, either in the kitchen, her bedroom or somewhere else where it will be seen and serve as a reminder of the way your child defines herself.
Rank Your Traits
One way to force your child to examine his strengths, traits and talents is to create a ranking. Tear up a piece of paper into 10 long strips. Have the child write one or two words on each piece of paper--these words should represent a talent he has, such as "basketball," "piano" or "listening." Once each piece has been written on, have your child rank these talents in order from his best to worst. Once he has done this, instruct your child to remove a trait as if he were no longer able to have those characteristics. Do this repeatedly until your child only has three of four pieces of paper left. Oftentimes, this will stress our your child as he tries to decide what he can afford to live without and struggles to accept losing an aspect of himself. Once you are down to three or four, permit him to add one trait, then another, over and over until he gets back to 10. You should notice a sense of relief and appreciation in your child over being able to regain lost aspects of who he is.
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