In a Reader's Digest "Marriage in America Survey," 42 percent of people identified depression as one of the major challenges facing their relationship. Depression can put a drain on even the healthiest marriage, as it is a mental disease that affects everyone around the sufferer. Tips on helping your mate through depression can put you back in control of the situation to help your mate feel better and come back to you as the person you remember.
Educate Yourself
Becoming more versed in the language, medications and symptoms of depression can help you to understand the condition that is making your mate suffer. Research depression and identify your mate's symptoms by comparing them to common depression symptoms. Purchase books like Jennifer M. Francis' "Living With a Depressed Spouse" or Michael D. Yapko's "Hand-Me-Down Blues: How to Stop Depression from Spreading in Families" to help teach you what to do to ease your mate's symptoms.
Take Charge
Your mate may deny that there is a problem and refuse to get treated for the disorder, says PsychCentral.com. In this case, it's up to you to take charge and do what you can to find treatment. Call your family care practitioner and tell her that your mate is exhibiting signs of depression. You may have to take him to his appointment, or help him find support groups. While depressed, your spouse may be embarrassed about his condition, so it's up to you to help him begin treatment. Be gentle but firm in your decision-making process.
Offer Support
As the mate of a depressed individual, it can feel like you're lonely and depressed yourself. Dealing with a person who is just the shell of the person you love can make you feel upset and even bitter about the situation. But it is your job to offer unconditional love to your mate during a difficult time, says Psychology Today. Look past the depression to the person your mate used to be, and focus on the treatment and recovery process. Berating your mate for her behavior may only cause her to feel more like a failure, and fall deeper into depression.
Attend Counseling
A counselor can be a helpful way for your mate to work through his depression, but you may also need to see a counselor to learn more about depression and talk about your feelings as you support your mate. The feelings of inadequacy, anger and impatience with your spouse can wear on you. Couples counseling can help you communicate with your depressed mate and work together to find solutions and treatment options that work. You may find that counseling is a powerful way to unload the burden of caring for a depressed mate.
