People with Alzheimer's disease and their loved ones may experience mixed emotions, depression and grief due to difficulty in coping with the symptoms. The Mayo Clinic recognizes that living with Alzheimer's is as emotionally strenuous on the caregivers and family members as it is on the patient. Often, the most difficult part of the process is accepting that the Alzheimer's patient is no longer the same. This leads to a process of grief and mourning.
Numbness and Denial
When you learn that a loved one has been diagnosed with a progressive disease, such as Alzheimer's, it can be a shocking reality. The Alzheimer's Association refers to this as the stage of denial. Denial occurs when a person may not want to believe the diagnosis and hopes that the illness is not severe. The person diagnosed with early Alzheimer's may experience denial also, as well as the loved one and caregiver. Feeling numb is associated with denial. Numbness often guards from the emotional turmoil of facing the reality of the disease.
Anger and Resentment
Anger commonly occurs, not only with the family members, but also in the Alzheimer's patient. The anger stage is signified by resentment about having the disease and also feeling resentment toward taking care of the Alzheimer's patient. This may intensify with time, leading to frustrations with other family members who are not contributing to care.
Guilt and Regret
The stage of guilt and regret is consuming because the family member tends to question what she did wrong and how she might have let the Alzheimer's patient down. The Fisher Center for Alzheimer's Research describes disappointment in unrealized expectations as part of this process. Guilt and regret also impact feelings of failure, which are mixed with thoughts of wishing the person with the disease would die.
Depression and Despair
For caregivers and loved ones, the sadness and despair often precede a final acceptance of the diagnosis or death of the Alzheimer's patient. Depression in the form of distractions and not engaging in normal daily activity commonly occur during this stage. Emotional numbness also appears as a means for guarding against pain in the reality of the illness.
Acceptance and Honoring
Dealing with grief eventually leads to accepting the diagnosis or the loss of the Alzheimer's patient. Acceptance is characterized by honoring the patient through reminiscing favorite memories with others or setting up a memorial. Acceptance also comes in the form of letting go of the anger from the patient's death. This stage of grief may occur prior to the actual death but typically follows it. Returning to normal daily activities and bonding with surviving loved ones and family members often signify acceptance.
