1. Separate Passive Aggression From Normal Types of Behaviors
Before you can manage passive aggressive behavior, it is important to separate this condition from laziness and procrastination that may exist within the normal realm of behavior. Most people may feel uncooperative or resentful at times if they find themselves locked into a promise under duress or excessive compromise. Passive aggression, however, is marked by a constant display of these of behaviors that have affected the individual's ability to complete basic responsibilities or carry on normal personal relationships.
2. Find the Causes of Passive Aggression
Passive aggressive behavior is usually based upon fear, resentment or flat-out anger. In order to manage passive aggressive behavior, these feelings and emotions need to be identified and addressed. Psychotherapists can use counseling to identify the feelings and emotions that are the root cause of passive aggressive behavior. Behavior therapists, however, may be able to change passive aggression much more quickly by using behavior modification techniques to achieve results.
3. Talk it Out
In many cases, passive aggression is not the result of a personality disorder or mental illness. In fact, passive aggressive behavior was recently taken out of the DSM-IV, the diagnostic manual used by mental health care professionals. Passive aggression is usually the result of a lack of communication between people and deep-seated feelings of fear and resentment that have grown slowly over time. If these behaviors are not addressed and managed when they first appear, the individual will recognize passive aggression as a solution to avoiding responsibility and will soon employ these tactics in all aspects of life.
While a counselor can often help a person to recognize and manage these behaviors, a passive aggressive person may just need the opportunity to get "something off his chest." Passive aggression is usually the result of unexpressed anger or hostility and many of the passive aggressive behaviors may lessen or disappear if the individual is encouraged to express these frustrations in a meaningful and productive way.
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