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Your sexual health is as important to your well-being as any other aspect of your physical and mental health. Understanding your sexual health can help you have a safe, satisfying sex life.
VAGINAL SECRETIONS
Q. Are vaginal secretions normal?
A. Yes. It's normal to have secretions at times of the month other than your period. These secretions keep the vagina clean, help prevent infection and provide lubrication during sexual arousal and intercourse. You may notice a clear, sticky discharge about two weeks after your period. This is normal and is a sign that you have ovulated, which may come in handy when you want to get pregnant. If your vaginal discharge itches, burns, smells bad or changes color, see a health care provider promptly because you may have an infection. Don't stress over it -- not all infections are STDs and even virgins occasionally get yeast and bacterial infections.
HIV RISK
Q. If two people test HIV negative, can they still give HIV to each other? What about virgins?
A. Theoretically, two people who have twice tested HIV-negative, the tests being done six months apart, are monogamous and don't share needles with anyone run virtually no risk of having or exchanging HIV. The same goes for people who have never had sex or shared needles with anyone. The problem is that these situations are more theoretical than real, since it's impossible to know everything about someone else's exposure or history. For example, you may not know if your partner's mother is HIV-positive and whether the virus could have been transmitted via the placenta or at birth. It's a matter of managing risks and deciding how much trust and risk you are willing to deal with.
BEING GAY
Q. How do I know if I'm gay?
A. Sexual feelings can be confusing, often more so if they seem to be directed toward members of your own sex. The main thing to do is relax and remember that you don't have to rush and "decide" what you are or what to call yourself. Sexual identities develop over time. If you relax and pay attention to your desires, you will be able to figure out what turns you on and what you're attracted to -- without worrying about what to call it or what you "are." Most people define themselves as lesbian, gay, bisexual or straight. But ultimately, people are more interesting and complicated than these names. It's up to you to figure out how you want to identify yourself. Keep in mind that there are as many sexualities as there are people out there; there's one that is uniquely yours.
HICKEYS
Q. What is the fastest way to get rid of a bruise on the neck caused from kissing (of course, I mean a hickey). My mom will flip out if she sees it, and it's very obvious. Help!
A. Sorry, but there is no "fast way" to get rid of a hickey. Just as you cannot make a bruise on your arm go away quickly, you cannot make one on your neck disappear. Of course, you have a range of cover-up options, such as makeup and creative uses of shirt collars, scarves and turtlenecks in the winter. You may be able to disguise the hickey for a few days until it becomes less noticeable. Or, you can act as if there's nothing wrong and be careful not to draw attention to the hickey. Maybe your mom will not notice, but chances are she will. Maybe she will surprise you and not "flip out." Remember, your mother went through the same thing when she was a teen. You could even ask your mom about the hickey before she asks you. Let her know that you'd like to talk about your dating, so you know where you both stand on the issue.
MALE VAGINA?
Q. I heard that guys have a female part; is this true?
A. Yes, kind of. All babies start out in the womb with primitive structures that develop into either male or female sexual organs. All males have a remnant of the tissue that develops into the vagina in females. This tiny tissue remnant is called the prostatic utricle or the vagina masculina. Men have nipples for the same reason.
DRY SEX
Q. We had sex with our clothes on. Could I get pregnant?
A. If you both had your clothes on the whole time and his penis did not enter your vagina, then no. Sperm can't swim through clothes. By the way, this is not considered sexual intercourse; many people call it "dry sex."
PREGNANCY RISK
Q. He "came" outside my vagina. Could I be pregnant?
A. It's not very likely if his penis was never inside you. If the sperm were deposited very close to the opening of the vagina, there is a small chance they could make it inside the vagina, but it's not likely. They still have to swim a long way from there. If the semen wasn't close to the vagina -- like on your thigh or leg -- the answer is probably not. If you mean that he pulled out and came, then you could be pregnant. Even if your guy pulls out in time -- which may or may not happen -- fluid called pre-ejaculate leaks from the penis before ejaculation. In many cases, there are more than enough sperm in the pre-ejaculate to impregnate a female. That's probably why there are so many of us here on this planet. The bottom line is to use birth-control methods that work -- and pulling out is not one of them.
KISSING AND HIV
Q. Can I get HIV from kissing?
A. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, there is no risk of contracting HIV from closed-mouth kissing. There is a slight risk of HIV transmission with deep, "French" kissing if your partner is infected and there is blood exchanged between you through mouth sores or bleeding gums. Like all safe sex, kissing is a matter of managing risks. If you are aware of cuts or sores in your mouth, it is best to abstain from deep kissing, but in general, kissing is one of the safest sexual activities.
References
- "AIDS: Science and Society"; Hung Fan, et al.; 2010
- Cleveland Clinic: Vaginal Discharge
- Nationwide Children's Hospital: Prostatic Utricle
- Centers for Disease Control and Prevention; HIV Transmission; March 2010
