Violence in relationships and families occurs with alarming frequency, and according to doctors Leslie A. Sackett and Daniel G. Saunders, 73 percent of battered women believe that mental abuse was more debilitating than the physical harm they endured.
According to Psychological Abuse in Violent Domestic Relations," mental abuse can be just as painful as physical abuse and, when dealt with properly, is taken just as seriously. If you suspect you or a friend is in a mentally or physically violent relationship, contact someone you trust, such as a domestic violence shelter.
Definition
Mental abuse is an overarching term for verbal, psychological and emotional abuse. (See References 2) It is characterized by manipulation and coercion of the abused person, often leading to self-doubt and a belief that there is no way out of a relationship or that without the abusive partner, there is no purpose. (See References 1) The abused person often overlooks mental abuse, usually because she can hide it from friends and family. (See References 1)
Signs of an Abuser
Mental abuse can be characterized by the abuser's manipulation of her partner, according to Brigham Young University. An abusive person may make threats to keep her abused partner under control, will blame the abused or constantly criticize her partner.
She may deny his needs to deliberately harm him, trivialize his feelings and make verbal assaults, playing on his weaknesses and belittling him, all for a feeling of control and to manipulate him to do her will.
Tactics
According to health website The Help Guide, abuse is always deliberate rather than a loss of control. An abuser will use strategies to exert control over his partner. An abuser will dominate a relationship and make his partner feel worthless and low by humiliating her.
He can also use isolation to restrict her outside contact and will threaten her to stay in control. He will also try to intimidate his partner into submission and will use tactics such as denial and blame to deflect his abusive ways onto his partner.
Warning Signs
If you know someone who is being restricted from seeing or talking with her friends or family members or she rarely goes out in public without her partner, she may be in a relationship marked with violence. Abused persons will begin to lack self-confidence or show other noticeable personality changes. An abused person may become depressed, withdrawn or seem anxious to please her partner, reports Help Guide.
Effects on Women
According to dcotors Roland D. Maiuro and Daniel O'Leary, psychological abuse can help maintain a violent relationship. They argue that psychological abuse can lead to self-doubt, diminishing a woman's identity and leaving her isolated and feeling worthless.
Without an identity and with too much isolation, women are left feeling completely vulnerable and unable to leave the relationship. Brigham Young University's fact sheet on relationship violence states that verbally abused women will experience more self-criticism or the woman will feel crazy, believing something is wrong with her.
References
- Help Guide: Domestic Violence and Abuse
- "Psychological Abuse in Violent Domestic Relations"; Preface; K. Daniel O'Leary and D. Maiuro, editors; 2001
- "Psychological Abuse in Violent Domestic Relations"; Chapter 11; Preface; K. Daniel O'Leary and D. Maiuro, editors; 2001
- Brigham Young University: Warning Signs of Emotional Abuse
- Brigham Young University: Effects of Verbal Abuse on the Abused
