Depression--Why Do People Get Depressed?
Sometimes people get seriously depressed after a intense incident, like a divorce in the family, someone you love dying, a stressful home life, violence, or breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend. Other times, depression just happens by itself.
Teenagers often react to the pain of depression by getting into trouble; trouble with alcohol, drugs, or sex; trouble with school or bad grades; problems with family or friends. This is another reason why it's important to get treatment for depression before it leads to other trouble.
Alcohol, Drugs and Depression
A lot of depressed people, including teenagers, also have problems with alcohol and or other drugs. Sometimes the depression comes first and people try drugs as a way to escape or as a way to "medicate" themselves. (In the long run, drugs or alcohol just make things worse.) Other times, the alcohol or other drug use comes first, and depression is caused by the drug itself, withdrawal from it or the problems that substance abuse causes.
Sometimes you can't tell which came first--the important point is that when you have both of these problems, the sooner you get treatment, the better. Either problems can make the other worse and lead to bigger trouble, like addiction or flunking school. You have to be honest about both problems--first with yourself and then with someone who can help you get into treatment; it's the only way to really get better and stay better.
What About Suicide?
Most people who are depressed do not commit suicide. But depression increases the risk for suicide or suicide attempts. It is not true that people who talk about suicide do not attempt it. Suicidal thoughts, remarks or attempts are always serious. If any of these happen to you or a friend, you must tell a responsible adult immediately! All talk of suicide should be taken seriously! Ask the person, "Do you feel like killing yourself?" Just come out and ask, then let them talk.
Myths About Depression
Myth: It's normal for teenagers to be moody; teens don't suffer from "real" depression.
Fact: Depression is more than just being moody. And it can affect people at any age, including teenagers.
Myth: Telling an adult that a friend might be depressed is betraying a trust. If someone wants help, they need to get it.
Fact: Depression, which saps energy and self-esteem, interferes with a person's ability or wish to get help. It is an act of true friendship to share your concerns with an adult who can help. No matter what you promised to keep secret, your friend's life is more important than a promise.
Myth: Talking about depression only makes it worse. Talking about your feelings to someone who can help, like a psychologist, is the first step towards beating depression. Talking to a close friend can also provide you with the support and encouragement you need to talk to your parents or school counselor about getting evaluated for depression. Please ask for help--that shows real courage!
Member Comments
by rickymoore on October 28, 2008 at 9:21 PM
what if your really scared to share your feelings with someone and you really want help?
by summerw on November 6, 2008 at 9:14 AM
hey i know how you feel. find some one that has the same problems as you and ask them if you can sit down and talk to them and say can i talk to you and can you give me some advice
by noktorn on December 14, 2008 at 8:31 PM
also try to give advice to that other person, because what you will find is that when you try to help someone else out, you'll end up discovering the roots to some of your own problems and helping yourself. Ghandi said a drowning man can't save another drowning man, but I say two drowning men can help each other out of the water.
by summerw on November 6, 2008 at 9:21 AM
can any one help me cop with wanting to hurt myself
by susanmarie on November 25, 2008 at 4:33 PM
I know how it feels to want to hurt yourself. I am 53 yrs. old and all my life I have either cut myself or broken my own bones. The physical pain hurts so much that it helps you not to feel the depair that you feel emotionally. You need to get on meds. or talk to someone. Many people do this so do not feel that you are different and behond help. When my meds. are working I can think better and handle my depression without the over whelming need to want to cut myself. The cutting not only relives the emotional pain but it is also a way of punishing yourself because you feel not worth anything. Sometimes that cutting pain reminds you that because you can feel physical pain then you are still human. But there are better ways to feel better. Go to speak with someone and if needed get meds. I never wanted to take meds. but once I gave in I found that taking them made the difference between life and death. They do take along time to work and sometimes you have to try many before you find the right one but once you do you will come out of that deep hole of depression. I will be thinking of you. I care about you. Susan
If you need me e-mail at susangullotta@yahoo.com
I will listen to you.
by shyann23 on January 8, 2009 at 3:26 AM
I think I'm depressed but I don't know. I have a very low self esteem and i take everthing to heart and it makes me very upset. I always think I'm not good enough and I'm just always upset. It also runs in my genes, my mother has it and my grandmother had it. Do you think I am?
by abetterme00 on January 8, 2009 at 4:07 AM
I used to be very depressed. Almost every night I cry myself to sleep. I didnt have many friends. Now I'm better but I still get depressed. Last time I cut myself few times just because I thought it was a way to help myself, but it wasn't. I never understand why im like this because I have a lovely family and great friends. I am also very insecure. I always wanted to be like this and like that.
I got a little better because the friends I have now are awesome and I can always talk to them about anything. They make me laugh and they make me feel special when they tell me they appreciate me for doing something for them.
by skarfun on February 16, 2009 at 2:52 PM
I'm 14 Can you tell me if i am depressed?
i have a really stressful family life
i like to be alone
if someones phones i do not want to talk to them
i feel like i am stupid and worthless
i feel like killing myself
i hate doing anything
i am anti-social
i can't get till sleep till 3 in the morning every night
now and again i sneak a bit of alcohol
i feel like everyday is the same
i only became like this when my parents got a divorce 4 years ago and my mum and step-dad started calling me stupid and stuff
and they said i must be getting bullied because of something i did
by tomigir on February 24, 2009 at 7:01 AM
God, all you just wrote brought me back. Seek help. The only thing I can say is, I got out of it somehow when about 16, and I was much better - i enjoyed a nice day, the sunset, had dreams to look forward to. Probably would have been a little faster if my parents saw I needed help! Hang in there! Get help, and know you are not alone! This stranger cares about you!!!
by PMB40 on February 24, 2009 at 5:39 PM
CUM loive with me,keep my 10 yr happy hes lonely.but very happy in life,his dad thinks hes stupid too but hey what would he know seeing him 1 hour a week,ur young u shud have good mates at school ect doesnt meen ur stupid at all familys spliting can cause probs cant u talk to either mum or dad? if not im got big ears:) and i would be upset if my 10 yr old was on sites as this b4 talking to me :)
by PMB40 on February 24, 2009 at 5:31 PM
talking helps but then can u find some 1 when u need them
to listen care and undestand?
had depression along time and many times i beat it
but i feel im back there again !! what can i do
limitied family
10 yr old son,,whos is brill,but wheres my life?
alone all day kid after school alone all nite,cant win for being a good mum!
by PMB40 on February 24, 2009 at 5:45 PM
people will listen just that sometimes we are to scared to talk,,because we dont always hear what we want too,but hey its better than doing harm to urself or others, tho i know sometimes thats the easy answer,i have never self harmed but can i ask those that have,,,,,,,,,,,why? attention,comfort? something all of us on here need? x
by Icantdoit on June 30, 2009 at 11:28 AM
I Have Self Harmed MySelf
I Just Got So Upset With Everything And Didnt Want To Be Here Anymore
by PMB40 on February 24, 2009 at 5:51 PM
hey u guys where are u all,we cud have a good day out depending where u live
were all in same boat,maybe we cud help each other raise a smile :)
by PMB40 on February 24, 2009 at 5:58 PM
abettetme00
you are special,,,u sound lonely tho get involved again with family do things shopping ect walks to park,and do more with ur mates instead of being alone,,,,,your young no ties,,kids ect enjoy life and make the most of it while u can,.remeber theres always some 1 worse off than ouselves x
by NeverEnding on March 26, 2009 at 9:57 PM
Well a lot of the time i feel really moody.
Like my ex girlfriend, and i feel like all my energy gets taken away and i feel like dying.
I don't know really what to do, i can't avoid her either because she is in a lot of my classes.
I have thoughts of suicide, and honestly i'm about at the end of my rope.
Idk, i feel really moody all the time. And not in the positive way. If anyone can help me, please.
I want to be happy again.
by accel123 on April 2, 2009 at 11:53 AM
i can be in a great mood then our of no were it changes and as my friends say they can tell by my body face expresions and change in my voice
i see these things some time but what does this mean could i be depressed? any one out there feel the same or know what it is
by mmm451 on May 26, 2009 at 4:22 AM
Exercise can be a very good help with depression. Try a long run or an intense bike ride. You should sweat a lot and go for about 30-40 mins. It should put you in a better mood for the day. Martial arts can also be very good for this purpose. I know a lot of people who have found this to be a tremendous stress relief.
Another good idea is reading books, playing Chess, or doing something else that gets your mind occupied, that you enjoy. I like watching the West Wing. Its only a TV show but gets me so absorbed that I forget about the rest of life for awhile. The key is getting some more exercise and getting your mind occupied.
Good luck, sorry to hear you are so down.
by Icantdoit on June 30, 2009 at 11:27 AM
Im Too Scared To Ask For Help Im Afraid People Wont Believe Me And Say I Want Attention I Also Feel Like I Dont Want To Be Here And That My Lifes A Complete Mess And Theres No Point Ive Attempted Suicide Twice And Im 13 I Really Want Help But Darent Please Help Me I Just Want To Be Happy And I Cry All The Time
Should I Tell My Support Manager At School I Keep Thinking I Should But I Dont Think They Will Take My Seriously
Help Please Im So Alone
by goldbearer on July 6, 2009 at 6:21 AM
I feel like cutting my wrist just to realise some pressure from my body,my reactions right now is like a manic depression,what can I do ,i feel like im a looser.
by bryan-ban1 on July 20, 2009 at 11:55 AM
i get scared of people i don't know because so i have no ability to make any friends. i used to have friends but they stopped liking me because they realized i was getting really depressed. i feel like a dumb looser. my life is not going straight at all. its not even going through a direction.
by bryan-ban1 on July 21, 2009 at 6:03 AM
teens don't do drugs to escape from their problems, they do it to fit in and to be on top.
by dotdom on July 21, 2009 at 8:30 PM
i need some1 to talk to that i dont know and cant get my family in the sh**T cause i want to open up 2 some1 to help myself but cant talk to my own family and feel i cant talk to others cause worried what they might tell some1.
i stay up for at least 2 days at a time then miss a day cause im sleeping even though ill get up i just stay in bed forcing myself to sleep so i dont talk to any1.
i perfer the night time cause no one is here to bother me
i really anti-socal
i left school at 14 and havnt been doing anything since and im 17
the only thing that makes me calm down is to hop on my motorbike and go out and i seem to forget everything.
music is great but my mum always says "god my are you listening to such sh**t music"
i hate to answer my phone cause it alway either my dad or some1 else.
i dont really have many friends any more, and the ones i have i feel only see me when they are bored and i feel like im better but worse than them.
i hate my life but love that i can do anything but still seem tht i cant do anything with it.
im ment to be going college in september but like my gran says i dont think i will make it cause dont want to be around the people.
i have taken drugs and drunk quite alot, i just to buy booze for other people to get a proffit to buy stronger stuff for myself, and drugs. but dont drink cause know it wont help as see my brother everyday drinking and dont want to be like him, ive smoked a few spliffs for the first time in years the other day and felt so good but scared i will start it again.
i dont know what to do anymore, i seem to live in my mind instead of the real world
by boxboxbox on November 20, 2009 at 11:04 PM
i dont have depression but my dad does i it really hearts its like he didnt even want to get better and that was the hardest part because it fels like i was not enue for him to want to get better he had so meny timeshe could have but he just didnt and now i am so scard because i dont have him any more its may be a good thing but its a bad thing too. i feel sad and emety alot and i am the only one who has not moved on with there life my mom has and she is changing i its soo hard because i feel like i cant comtrol any ting like right now she is on a trip with out me she is with frieds that i dont know i try to talk about it but some times its nice to know thatthe person i and talking to i dont even know or have never meet my name is betty i am 15 and i just want some one to talk to
help!