Typical Roles Found in Alcoholic Families

When one member of a family is affected by alcoholism, the entire family structure begins to mold itself around the alcoholic's "dis-ease." Family members are often forced to ignore their own needs in order to focus attention on the the alcoholic. Family members unconsciously act out six distinct "character" roles:
<B>The Caretaker/Enabler:</B> This person tends to everyone's needs. A caretaker loses his sense of self in tasks related to running the household. He tries to keep everybody happy by placating and making excuses for unhealthy or dysfunctional behavior within the family. When asked about the goings on within the family by "outsiders," he puts on airs of a problem-free family while denying his underlying fears of inadequacy and helplessness. Multigenerational alcoholic families will sometimes designate a child in this role, which is a sign of more significant pathology. Usually, a parent accepts this role.

<B>Purpose:</B> To maintain appropriate appearances to the outside world.

<B>Negative Consequence:</B> The caretaker/enabler never takes the time to assess his own needs and feelings and
often comes across as emotionally aloof and superficial. Inside, the caretaker/enabler feels unfulfilled, disconnected, and out of control.

<B>The Responsible One:</B> This role is usually delegated to the eldest child in the family. She functions as a surrogate parent taking care of younger siblings and many of the chores and responsibilities around the house. Other common names for this role are "the little parent" or "little professor."

<B>Purpose:</B> To maintain order and minimal functioning within the household.

<B>Purpose:</B> The scapegoat gives the family every opportunity to focus their attention on things other than the effects of alcoholism on the family.

<B>Negative Consequence:</B> The real problems in the family are not identified and addressed while the scapegoat
rebels against her true feelings of shame, guilt and emptiness.

<B>The Mascot/Cheerleader:</B> This is the fun and funny member of the family. She is the life of the party. Often this child is named a class clown in school. She "lights-up the room." Family gatherings are generally mundane and boring until the mascot arrives. This person feels responsible for everyone in the family getting along and will attempt to derail family conflict with jokes and comedic relief.

<B>Purpose:</B> To provide levity and comic relief to the family.

<B>Negative Consequence:</B> The laughter is a diversionary tactic that prevents healing rather than produces it. This
person is terrified of conflict and struggles with any form of intimate relationship due to her/his fear of conflict.

<B>The Lost Child:</B> The lost child is the forgotten child. As the title suggests, the lost child disappears within the activities of the family. The child is often left places or otherwise forgotten. You will often find this child sitting alone in front of the television or a computer, reading a book, or sitting alone in his room. Due to the sedentary lifestyle and a lack of Emotional fulfillment, the lost child tends to have issues with weight.

<B>Purpose:</B> A lost child is extremely low-maintenance, rarely placing demands on the family for time and attention.
He doesn't make waves and avoids confrontation to the point of giving up on his needs.

<B>Negative Consequence:</B> The lost child feels very lonely neglected, angry and guilty. He is all but invisible to the
rest of the family and sees much more than is vocalized.