Effective communication requires the ability to accurately give and receive information through verbal and nonverbal cues. According to The Center for Literacy Studies at the University of Tennessee, "the key element of effective communication is understanding." Talking and active listening are the key components in achieving this goal.
Talking
The ability to express your thoughts and feelings in a clear and concise manner is necessary for effective communication. Understanding your intended message will allow you to more easily portray it to someone else. Do not assume that the other person knows what you are thinking or understands your feelings. Take responsibility by using "I" sentences. For example, "I feel" rather than "you make me feel." Avoid the use of extreme terms such as "always" and "never."
Listening
Listening is often underrated in the art of communication. You can listen without actually hearing what is said. Active listening encourages effective communication. Providing a response with nods or verbal acknowledgment lets your wife know that you are listening. Clarifying what your husband has said, in your own words, ensures that you are hearing what he is trying to say. Asking questions regarding intent and meaning will allow you to better understand, while showing that you truly care about the intended message.
Observing
Be aware of visual cues. If your son has his arms crossed and is facing away from you, he is likely uncomfortable with the conversation. Observing body language may allow you to adjust the situation, providing for increased communication potential. Would it be better to speak privately, or at a different time? Paying attention to these signals will increase your communication experience.
Understanding
To be an effective communicator, you must be able to understand where the other person is coming from. Know that you might not share the same point of view. Keep an open mind and avoid judgment, criticism and disagreement. You may listen to your daughter's point of view while maintaining your own.
Evaluating
To increase your effectiveness as a communicator, it is important to accurately assess your strengths and weaknesses. Answering some of these questions may be helpful if you are honest in your response. Do you talk more than you listen? Do you interrupt during a conversation? Are you able to clearly state what it is that you are feeling? Do you give affirmation during a conversation? Does your mind wander if you don't find the topic interesting? Do you have your mind made up before the conversation begins? Do you make every conversation about you? If you are comfortable, ask someone close to you to give their opinion as well.
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