Verbal communication is important in sharing--and understanding--thoughts and ideas. At its most basic, verbal communication relies on one person listening while someone else is speaking. However, this isn't as easy as it sounds. If you aren't careful, your emotions or other distractions can get in the way of effective communication. Be aware of potential issues, and practice good communication skills to increase your ability to effectively exchange information.
Anger
Your emotions may negatively impact your ability to communicate. It's difficult to maintain an open mind and listen to what the other person is saying if you're angry. When you're angry, defensiveness and self-protection become your primary goal. Listening and understanding the other person's message becomes less of a priority. Use "I" statements to minimize this verbal communication issue. For instance, instead of "you make me feel," say "I feel." Such phrases decrease the chance that the other person will feel like you're attacking him.
Joy
Don't let the power of your emotions sweep you away. Even positive emotions, such as extreme excitement and happiness, can decrease your ability to effectively communicate. If you're feeling joyful, it may be difficult to recognize that others may not share your feelings. Avoid minimizing another person's thoughts--don't let your emotions keep you from listening when she's speaking to you.
Self-importance
Self-importance can create issues with communication. Feeling as if you always have a better story than someone else is referred to as "me-too-ism," according to a Group Works Bulletin from the University of Maine. Avoid this type of attitude, never say, "That's nothing, let me tell you what happened to me." There's no quicker way to shut down communication than to minimize what the speaker is saying. Being a know-it-all also can be harmful. If you have the need to always be right, it can decrease your ability to get the whole picture. Avoid judging the thoughts, feelings and ideas of others during your conversations.
Distractions
Advances in technology can increase the distractions around you. This can make it difficult to communicate well with others. If you feel a constant need to be "plugged in," it can have a negative impact on your verbal communication skills. It's difficult--if not impossible--to listen properly if you're watching television, texting, answering a constantly ringing phone or working on a computer. Avoid multi-tasking or trying to carry on two conversations at once. Give your undivided attention to one conversation to avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
Listening
Talking more than you listen will have a negative impact on how much you hear and understand. Don't assume you know what the speaker means. Prove you're paying attention--repeat the other person's message back to him in you own words. Ask questions so he'll provide you with more details. Good listening skills require the ability to maintain an open mind while truly trying to understand the other person's viewpoint.



Member Comments