Rules of Conflict

Rules of Conflict
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Whether you're looking to resolve a conflict at work or at home, it can escalate quickly into a power struggle, a yelling match and some hurt feelings. Knowing the right way to resolve problems and laying the ground rules of conflict ensure that everyone involved knows what's expected and the procedure for conflict resolution. Through the rules of conflict, you can come to a satisfying and civil conclusion that takes into consideration the needs and wants of all parties involved

Walk Away

Trying to engage in conflict resolution when you feel hot-headed and personally attacked won't work; the following negotiations and communication will be tainted with hurt feelings. Instead, walk away and cool down before you begin any conflict-resolution proceedings. Organize your thoughts so you can come back with stronger arguments and logical ideas for solutions and do so in a calm and collected manner.

Separate People and Problems

It can be difficult to see past a person's doings or ideas, but when you're dealing with conflict, you should remember that the person isn't the same as the problem, says the business website MindTools.com. Avoid making any kind of personal attacks or assumptions based on someone's character. Instead, focus on the problem at hand and how it can be fixed; don't try to fix the person involved in the conflict.

Gain Perspective

Successful conflict resolution depends in part on gaining perspective about how the conflict began and what's at stake in the resolution procedure, according to CBN.com. Think about the other people involved and why they maintain the stance they do. Identify why there is a problem and how all of the sides will be affected with each solution that you come up with. Doing so can give you greater insight about the cause of the conflict and how best to address it.

One At a Time

Never let the conflict resolution proceedings reach an angry or fevered yelling stage. Conflict should be managed in a civil and calm way, so make sure that only one person is permitted to speak at a time, suggests the Office of Human Resources of the University of Wisconsin. By monitoring the atmosphere and schedule of conflict management, you can keep anger and personal attacks under control. If necessary, meet with parties singly, or use an orderly presentation approach so that everyone gets a turn to discuss their own view of problems and ideas for resolution.

Brainstorm Together

It takes a variety of people to become embroiled in a conflict, and it takes just as many to work out the terms of resolution. After everyone has been heard as an individual, brainstorm ideas and solutions as a group, involving all of those who are affected so they know they had a say in the final solution. Show cooperation and compromise as you work together to locate and implement the best resolution strategies possible.

References

Article reviewed by J.O. Bugental Last updated on: Jun 18, 2010

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