If you understand the type of conflicts you encounter, you are more likely to be able to handle them effectively and possibly find solutions. You may find that re-evaluating your communication style and remaining open to the viewpoints of others can resolve your conflicts. Additionally, accepting conflicts as a normal part of life and preparing yourself to deal with them may lead to future success in tough situations.
Structural
Structural conflicts are caused by external forces such as limited resources, geographic restrictions and organizational changes. These conflicts may be stressful but there are often structural solutions that involve tapping into other resources. For example, if you want to plan a special date for your partner but have limited funds, cooking a candlelit dinner and watching a rented movie may be a more cost-effective and personal idea than an expensive vacation.
Relationship
Relationship conflicts most often occur because of a lack of communication, the presence of strong negative emotions and unfulfilled expectations. Miscommunication must be acknowledged and worked out--although agreement is not necessary--to help relationships become successful. Negative strong emotions often fuel arguments that may focus on vague issues instead of addressing those problems that really matter. Unfulfilled expectations are normally the result of repetitive behaviors that can be hurtful to the other person. An effective way to deal with this conflict is to support and encourage the perspectives, needs and communication styles of others so that you can learn to confront future conflicts.
Communication
We each have our own communication style--aggressive, passive-aggressive, assertive or passive--and failure to understand a particular communication style can lead to communication conflicts. Conflicts of communication are usually the basis for other conflicts so do your best to communicate your opinions and feelings clearly.
Interest
Conflicts of interest are the result of one or more groups of people who believe that in order to satisfy their needs, the needs or interests of others must be sacrificed. Conflicts of interests in personal relationships may occur over substantive issues such as the time you spend with your partner, psychological issues such as respect and trust or procedural issues such as conflict resolution. An effective way to handle conflicts of interest is to solicit the opinion of a mediator such as a friend who can help you both respect each other's interests, recognize positive intentions and agree upon a desired outcome.
Internal
Your internal struggles with thoughts, feeling or ideas create self-conflicts. These conflicts can arise when you reflect on a time when you feel you could have done more to contribute to a solution. These self-conflicts can also arise when you must make a choice for your life or the life of your loved ones. Self-conflicts are best solved when you do what you believe will be best in the end.
Value
Your personal values help you decide what is "right" and "wrong." People can coexist with differing values but conflict can begin when others try to force their values on you. To handle value conflicts, accept the values of others while still remaining true to your own.
Data
Most data conflicts occur when people lack the necessary information to make informed and wise decisions. Other data conflicts surface when people disagree on which information is vital to the given situation. For example, if you are asked to give important advice to a friend but you only know one side of the issue, you may feel conflicted about giving advice. Fortunately, most data conflicts have data solutions so asking questions for more information can help you make better decisions.
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