Marrying a college sweetheart and starting a family may be what one woman may envision to be the ultimate reward in life, but satisfaction is relative term for each woman. She may remain single for numerous reasons, but regardless of her motivation, a woman doesn’t need to be engaged in a relationship to lead a fulfilling life.
Career Advancement
Being a successful professional is often sufficient motivation for a woman to remain single. She enjoys the competitive process of advancing to the executive positions at work and finds it extremely satisfying that she’s genuinely earned her place in a company full of men. Managing a successful career, in addition to maintaining a relationship and a family, may hinder a woman's aspirations and goals. Despite the progression of a woman's right to advance her career, a female in the workplace still has to work harder than her male counterparts to obtain promotions, says Ella Edmondson Bell, associate professor of business administration at Dartmouth College and author of “Career GPS: Strategies for Women Navigating the New Corporate Landscape.”
Autonomy
Relationships necessitate compromise between your wishes and desires and those of your partner. A single woman can enjoy autonomy in making decisions because she is the sole voice when she must choose between options. Single-hood permits a woman to sustain a relationship with herself, as her own entity—free from being identified in a role that defines her in relation to a partner. In her book, "Single: The Art of Being Satisfied, Fulfilled and Independent," psychotherapist Judy Ford dispels the myths of single-hood by saying: “Single is not a condition to be cured, it's just as natural as being part of a couple. Single is about upholding the most enduring relationship of all: the one we have with ourselves.”
Financial Manageability
Having a partner and a family means splitting your financial resources. In addition to your own needs, you must to consider the monetary requirements of others within your relationship, and assume responsibility for what that may entail. On the other hand, the single woman can spend her money any way she wants.
Sexual Freedom
A single woman may enjoy the freedom to exercise her female sexuality in any manner she chooses. Author and social psychologist Bella DePaulo says that the women’s rights movement and scientific breakthroughs have secured a woman’s ability to maintain her sexual and reproductive rights in a revolutionary way. A woman doesn’t need to be married to have a sexual relationship, and she no longer needs a partner to reproduce.
Single-Parenting
A single mother may wish to remain unattached to devote all of her attention to her children. She may feel an obligation to protect them from the possibility of confusion or further trauma, if they’ve already experienced exposure to a failed relationship. Family psychologist Lesley Foulkes-Jamison says that children, especially young ones, can suffer extreme stress through a parent’s divorce, and it can take years for them to recover.
Family Responsibilities
Caring for a sick loved one is an immense responsibility for a woman to assume. Supporting herself and taking care of someone who is disabled or in need of care can completely consume her life, preventing her from engaging in any relationships. Edmondson-Bell says that a woman in the workplace who’s also taking care of someone at home is more likely to be subject to “stress, pressure, exhaustion, burnout and heart attacks.”
No Desire to Marry
A woman may have no inclination toward developing a relationship with one partner or getting married. Ford says that some people value developing relationships with relatives and friends more than limiting the development of a connection to one person.
Fear of Commitment
Experiencing her parent’s failed relationship may have left an emotional scar on a woman. Enduring the pain of her parents' divorce may have made her unwilling to accept the possibility of ever reliving the suffering she encountered in childhood. Clinical psychologist Ana Nogales says that a child’s reaction to a man’s betrayal has enduring consequences. She asserts that a woman who has seen that betrayal in her parents' relationship may accept the behavior in a partner or attempt to avoid it altogether.
Negative Experiences
Suffering at the hands of an abuser or a cheating partner has exposed a woman to the negative side of relationships. Embarking on a new relationship in which she risks the same outcome may not be worth the risk. Nogales believes that a woman may assume that the past dictates her encounters in the future, and she may find it more valuable to remain free of that type of any relationship.
FInding the Right One
A woman may not have met the right person with whom to spend the rest of her life. Today, a woman often waits until later in life to get married and start a family. In the meantime, remaining single is a valid option, psychologist DePaulo says. A woman today has the freedom to choose the single life, because she no longer feels the responsibility to settle for someone out of a sense of societal obligation.
References
- Science Career Site: The 21st Century Workplace -- Are Women the New Men?
- Psychology Today: Living Single: It Is How We Spend the Better Part of Our Adult Lives
- Judy Ford: Single The Art of Being Satisfied, Fulfilled and Independent.
- Clinical Psychology Associates of Northern Florida: The Effects of Divorce on Children
- Psychology Today: Do Children Learn to Adapt to a Parent’s Betrayal?
