"In jealousy there is more of self-love than love," as 17th-century French author François de la Rochefoucauld once said. Today, social psychologists agree. Jealousy is a moral emotion that serves to protect our self-worth, just like anger and resentment do, according to Christine R. Harris, an associate professor of psychology at University of California, San Diego. Self-worth is an adaptive trait, so this definition of jealousy is consistent with the emotion being an evolutionary-fitness enhancer, says Dr. Harris.
Evolution of Jealousy
Evolutionary psychologists speculate that different kinds of cheating trigger anger and fear in men and women for different evolutionary reasons. A man who used his scarce resources on another man's children would likely hinder the spread of his genes, whereas a woman who lost the father of her children to another woman would have difficulty surviving. So sexual cheating should cause more anger and fear in men, whereas emotional cheating should be more upsetting to women. This theory has received support from studies that ask participants to pick which of two scenarios is more distressing and anger-provoking, one involving sexual cheating or one involving emotional cheating.
Strong Ancestral Women
The evolutionary story of the sex differences in jealousy is controversial, however. According to psychology professors Wendy Wood from University of Southern California and Alice Eagly from Northwestern University, ancestral men didn't always stick around to provide for the women they impregnated. In some cultures, women were the providers. We don't know whether these women got furious with jealousy when their mates left them for other women, but keeping their men around would not have helped them survive, the researchers explain.
Siblings and Friends
Dr. Harris expresses skepticism about the evolutionary jealousy theory. The empirical studies show that men and women are attuned to different kinds of cheating. But once a partner has already cheated, it is too late to prevent it. So, the preventative story offered by the evolutionary theory is not backed up, says Harris. She also points out that the evolutionary theory cannot explain why jealousy can arise between people who don't provide for each other or don't have children together, such as siblings and friends.
Psychological Theory
Social psychologists take a different approach to jealousy and the accompanying anger. Jealousy, they say, arises in response to a potential loss of something we perceive to be valuable in ourselves or in our relationships. If your partner prefers a rival over you, not only do you lose a relationship, your partner has also wronged you by implicitly devaluing your traits, says Dr. Harris. As the psychological theory does not center around procreation, it can explain why jealousy can arise between siblings and friends. Harris emphasizes that the theory is consistent with jealousy having had an evolutionary advantage. Jealousy may have originated in siblings competing for parents' attention, Harris explains.
Jealousy as a Form of Anger
Jealousy is ranked among the top three motives for manslaughter when the motive is known. When jealousy leads to aggression, the anger component appears to be the driving force. Social psychologists believe there is a deeper reason for this. According to Phil Shaver, a social psychologist at University of California, Davis, what we call "anger" is a cocktail of negative emotions arising in response to thoughts or perceptions of harm to ourselves or something we value. Rage, or madness, is indeed a driving force in jealousy murders or other jealous frenzies, but it may be a driving force because jealousy is a type of complex anger.
References
- "American Scientist"; The Evolution of Jealousy; Christine R. Harris; vol. 92, 2004
- "Jealousy: Theory, Research, and Clinical Strategies"; G. L. White and P. E. Mullen; 1989
- "Psychological Bulletin"; A Cross-Cultural Analysis of the Behavior of Women and Men: Implications for the Origins of Sex Differences; Wendy Wood and Alice Eagly; vol. 128, 2002
- "Psychological Science"; Sex Differences in Jealousy; D. M. Buss et al.; vol. 3, 1992
- "Journal of Personality and Social Psychology"; Emotion knowledge: Further Exploration of a Prototype Approach; P. Shaver et al.; vol. 52, 1987
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