The death of a pet can be traumatic. You may feel extreme sorrow, along with guilt over the depth of your feelings, especially if people around you try to dismiss them as inappropriate. The Humane Society of the United States notes it is not unusual to feel overwhelmed by the intensity of your sorrow when your pet dies; animals provide unconditional love and support, creating a powerful bond. With time, you can move beyond your grief, accept your loss and remember your pet with joy.
Step 1
Express your grief, and be aware that you will feel sad, withdrawn, depressed and even angry. Help Guide advises that it is not unusual to have trouble sleeping, eating or concentrating after the loss of an animal companion. According to the Humane Society, the pet's death--painful in itself--may trigger memories of other losses, especially if you are an older adult.
Step 2
Reach out to others to express the grief you are feeling. If family members share your loss, talking about the pet may elicit tears, but also memories and laughter. Close friends who witnessed the bond between you and your pet can be good choices for a sympathetic ear. However, other bereaved pet owners may be your best source of support. The Humane Society suggests calling your local humane society to find a pet loss support group. Call a pet bereavement hotline if talking to family and friends doesn't seem to help and you can't find a support group in your area. The hotlines are staffed by counselors who may be able to find ways to help you cope with your grief.
Step 3
Buy a notebook or journal, and write your feelings down. You can create a eulogy for your pet, write it a letter or record your feelings and memories. According to Help Guide, remember and write how your pet came into your life, the types of activities you did together, the important life moments your pet saw your through, and the feelings you had when you were with your pet.
Step 4
Plan a memorial for your pet, if you feel it would help comfort you. You can make the event as simple or elaborate as you want, ranging from a private meditation to a ceremony at your home for you and your pet's closest friends. You can use old photos, scissors, tape and a poster board to display a collage made of photos of your pet, or play video footage.
Step 5
Make a donation of money--or better yet, your time--at a local animal shelter in memory of your pet. Volunteering financial or personal resources may help give a sense of meaning to your loss.
Step 6
See a therapist or clergy person if you are unable to return to normal activities, or if your sadness is unrelieved or persistent. Help Guide notes that while feelings of sadness are normal after a pet dies, clinical depression is not.
Tips and Warnings
- Create a poem, a drawing, a website or a song in your pet's memory. The more you lose yourself in the creative act, the more you may be able to move through your grief.
- Proceed carefully when it comes to the decision to get another pet. Help Guide points out that although it is tempting to try to fill the void with another pet, veterinarians and grief counselors advise mourning the old pet so the eventual new one can be appreciated for its own sake, not as a replacement.
