One of the biggest challenges that people in emotionally abusive relationships face is that emotional abuse is not taken seriously by most people, according to the Sexual Assault and Relationship Abuse Prevention and Support Center at Stanford University. Unlike physical abuse, which leaves clear signs like bruises and broken bones, emotional abuse is less obvious. But the cycle of threats, intimidation and insults that make up emotional abuse can be just as damaging as physical abuse. Getting out of an emotionally abusive relationship isn't easy, but it is always worth the effort.
Step 1
Commit to leaving. This isn't always easy because of the cyclical nature of emotional abuse--your partner's emotional violence is usually followed by periods of affection and tenderness. The longer you stay in an abusive relationship, the harder it is to leave, the Mayo Clinic warns.
Step 2
Reach out for help. People in emotionally abusive relationships may become isolated from friends and family members, but if you are going to successfully leave an emotionally abusive relationship, it is important to have a strong support system in place. Rebuild relationships with friends and family, and don't be afraid to ask for their help, recommends KidsHealth.org, an online health and parenting information resource maintained by the Nemours Foundation.
Step 3
Choose a safe place to go if you live with your abusive partner. If you cannot stay with family or friends, call 800−799−SAFE (7233) to find a shelter in your area. Many accept victims of emotional abuse in addition to physical abuse victims.
Step 4
Let your partner know that your relationship is over and you do not want her to contact you. Though it may seem rude to do this over the phone, a phone call is safer than face-to-face contact. If you need to end the relationship in person, bring a friend or family member with you since emotional abusers often escalate to physical violence.
Step 5
Take measures to protect yourself. Change your locks if your partner has a key to your home, and change your phone number and email address so that he cannot contact you. If your partner stalks you or becomes violent, file a police report and seek professional advice on how best to protect yourself.
Tips and Warnings
- Emotional abuse can take an enormous toll on your self-esteem. If you're leaving an emotionally abusive relationship, working with a mental health professional can help restore your damaged confidence.
- If your partner monitors your computer use or if you suspect that he might track your online activity, be aware that it is impossible to completely hide your online activity. If you are concerned that your partner might become physically abusive if he realizes you are considering leaving your relationship, use a safe computer--at a friend's house or in a library--instead of your personal computer.
Member Comments