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Signs He's Not Worth Dating

by
author image Becky Swain
Becky Swain's first publication appeared in the "Journal of Personality Assessment" in 1984. Her articles have also appeared on various websites. She is an adjunct college instructor, licensed school psychologist and educational consultant. She holds a Master of Science in clinical psychology and a Doctor of Philosophy in educational psychology, both from Mississippi State University.
Signs He's Not Worth Dating
Dating doesn't have to be scary if you know what to avoid. Photo Credit Medioimages/Photodisc/Photodisc/Getty Images

Regardless of whether you enter the dating scene wearing rose-colored glasses or your heart on your sleeve, dating is a challenge for most singles. Dating usually requires an investment of time, money and emotional commitment. You’re not asking for much. You simply want an equitable return on your investment, and you want a happy ending. Look for signs early in the relationship that signal when a man doesn’t merit your time or attention.

Secret Agent Date

Beware of a man who reveals little about himself or who behaves like a spy employed by a foreign embassy. Poor communication at the onset of your relationship usually signals that a man has something to hide. This guy may have self-serving motives for his lack of transparency, reports the Huffington Post in the article “Cheating Signs: 3 Ways to Identify a Cheater.” You won't like what he's concealing, so locate the nearest exit.

Run, Don't Walk

End at the speed of light a relationship with a man who exhibits abuse, threats of abuse and rage. When you observe the first sign of physical, emotional, verbal or sexual abuse, resolve to never spend another second with this individual. Abusive tactics are efforts to exercise control. Equally unacceptable control strategies include threats and rage, which signal emotional instability and social immaturity. Toddlers respond to hassles with tantrum behavior, but emotionally mature adults employ problem-solving skills.

Leave If You Can't Breathe

Listen to your instincts if you feel smothered by a man’s jealousy. If a man wants to know your location, who you are with and your minute-by-minute itinerary, the relationship is already well on its way to feeling like a heavily guarded jail cell, advises psychologist Hara Estroff Marano in the "Psychology Today" article titled “Jealousy: Love’s Destroyer.” Although small displays of jealousy are flattering, an interrogation about what you did during your lunch break clearly crosses the line.

Offer a Tissue as You Leave

It’s not forbidden to refer to a previous relationship, but drop the man who manages to bring the ex-girlfriend or ex-wife into every conversation. If you feel that the waiter should bring a third chair to the table because an evening out is never a dinner date for two, don’t invest your time in this heartbroken man. Permit him to pursue a rebound romance with someone else, and pity the man if you wish. The guy is still emotionally committed to someone else, so he may not even miss you.

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