According to the U.S. Surgeon General, almost two out of three Americans are overweight, so it is likely you have a loved one who needs to lose weight. But, telling your loved one they are overweight can lead to hurt feelings and a poor relationship if not done correctly.
Preparation
Step 1
You need to come into this conversation completely prepared. Decide when and where you want to talk to your loved one. Make sure to plan the conversation for a day where you will have enough time to complete the conversation. You don't want to talk to your loved one about such a sensitive topic right before she has to go to work or has other obligations. Also, make sure you choose a private place where you won't be interrupted.
Step 2
Plan what you are going to say. Think about your loved one's personality and how he prefers to be talked to. If he hates being told what to do, make sure your talk does not sound controlling or bossy.
Step 3
Research the risks of being overweight and the benefits of being healthy. According to Mayo Clinic, symptoms of obesity include back or joint pain, difficulty sleeping and depression. But getting in shape through physical activity leads to improved moods, increased energy levels, better sleep and reduced risk of chronic diseases.
The Conversation
Step 1
Bring the subject up gently. According to ABC News, your loved one is more likely to accept what you are saying if you come across as caring and nonjudgmental. Do not accuse her of having poor eating habits or not exercising enough. This will make her defensive.
Step 2
Explain that you love him exactly the way he is and you are only talking to him because you are concerned about his health and well-being. Explain that being overweight leads to increased health risks and poor self-esteem, which you don't want your loved one to experience.
Step 3
Reduce the chances of your loved one feeling bad about herself by pointing out that two out of three Americans are overweight. Explain that our culture encourages obesity with fast food restaurants and large serving sizes. Placing part of the blame on someone else reduces the embarrassment your loved one may feel about the conversation.
Step 4
Develop a plan with your loved one. Asking him how you can help him manage his weight shows that you truly care. Offer to go grocery shopping with him to pick healthier foods or cook a healthy meal together. Offer to workout together and find a fun exercise you enjoy doing together. If you want to lose some weight, too, then tell your loved one you want to work as a team to lose weight together.
Step 5
After the conversation be supportive of your loved one and congratulate her on improvements. Do not accuse her of eating poorly or not exercising enough because this comes off as judgmental. Once you've had the conversation and offered to help, it is out of your hands. Your loved one needs to decide that she wants to lose weight and make healthy choices herself.
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