Evenings can be frustrating for parents of toddlers. Toddlers rarely want to go to bed on time, and when they are ready to go to bed, it's usually your bed they want to go to. It's important for toddlers to get used to sleeping independently to prevent issues when they are older. It also enables you and your spouse to have some much needed alone time.
Step 1
Explain to your toddler that he is old enough to sleep in his own bed and that sleeping in your bed is not an option. Talk things through with him as best you can so that he is prepared for what will happen at bedtime. Even though he may not be able to understand everything that you say, he will be able to get the main point. Also explain to him that if he comes into your room in the middle of the night, you will return him to his own bed.
Step 2
Create a bedtime routine which is comforting and makes your child want to fall asleep, in her own bed. Make sure you always take her to her bed for the routine. Read her a book or offer her a stuffed animal. You can also sing to her or rock her to sleep. Having a routine at the same time every night will help make your child calmer and more likely to fall asleep in her bed.
Step 3
Follow through with what you've told your toddler. Dr. Robert Needlman, pediatric behavior specialist, states on the parenting website Dr. Spock that the only way to get a toddler to sleep independently is to force him into his own bed until he gets more used to it. You may only have to tell him to get into his own bed, or you may actually have to pick him up repeatedly and put him back into his own bed. Be persistent, however many times it takes until he stays in his bed. The Mayo Clinic states that you may even have to put up a barrier, such as closing your bedroom door, to prevent him from getting into your bed.
Step 4
Allow her to cry as much as she wants, but don’t give in and allow her to sleep with you. You can also continue to come into her room every 30 minutes to check in on her and let her know you are still around, but ultimately, you need to leave her in her own bed. If you really can’t stand to hear your toddler cry, Needlman recommends sitting in a chair in your child’s room while she lies in her bed. This way, she sees you and you see her, but she is still going to fall asleep alone.
Step 5
Praise him in the morning when he wakes after sleeping in his own bed. He may be grumpy about waking up alone, even if you are the one to wake him. Yet the more positive you act around him, the more positive he will be. Tell him how proud you are that your big boy slept in his own special bed.
Things You'll Need
- Comfort items like books or stuffed animals
