Some kids are naturally obedient and easy to manage, but others seem unresponsive to the consequences of imposed discipline and punishments. They may be more inclined to question rules, test things for themselves, or may struggle with poor impulse control. Typical punishments, like time outs or loss of privileges, may not encourage desirable behaviors or curb undesirable ones. Helping these kids to learn boundaries, rules and appropriate behavior may require different, but loving, discipline tactics from parents, teachers and caregivers.
Step 1
Provide a safe, appropriate and structured environment. Pediatrician William Sears suggests that while it is the child's job to explore, it's the parents' job to provide an appropriate environment. This includes establishing the physical space and setting necessary limits. Childproof your home to create a friendlier environment for young children.
Step 2
Set reasonable, age-appropriate rules and expectations for your children. Know what your kid's limitations, strengths and weaknesses are to appropriately judge his behavior.
Step 3
Supervise your children closely if you are concerned about misbehavior and foster good communication. Catch your child before behavior escalates and guide them toward more acceptable choices, whether you have a toddler or a teen. Redirect children from a negative behavior to a more positive one, recommends Ibtisam S. Barakat, University of Missouri Extension associate, and Janet A. Clark, a specialist in human development and family studies.
Step 4
Model appropriate behavior, including respectful language, responsibility, and emotional maturity, suggests Rajeswari Natrajan and Judith A. Myers-Walls from the article, "Making Discipline Positive" on the Provider Parent Partnerships website. Use opportunities in daily life to illustrate sharing, trying new things, or handling difficult situations. Stress to your children that kindness, respect, and consideration are all important values to your family.
Step 5
Allow your child to experience the natural consequence of his behavior when it is safe to do so. Natural consequences can allow your child to learn why the rules exist, whether she has to pay for a lost book or he loses a treasured toy.
Step 6
Determine the reason behind poor behavior. Healthy, well-fed and well-rested children are better able to behave appropriately. Talk to your children about potential upset or stress if they are acting out without a clear reason for doing so.
Tips and Warnings
- Positive discipline isn't about correcting negative behavior, but rather about encouraging and motivating good behavior.
- Avoid allowing children to experience natural consequences of certain behaviors when they could result in harm.
