Losing a person you love is painful and upsetting. Emotions of surprise, anger, guilt and extreme sadness may feel like they'll never fade, according to the Help Guide website. Part of the healthy grieving process is accepting that these feelings are normal. Work on learning ways to handle the pain. The University of Washington Counseling Center claims that healthy grieving allows you to let go of energy that connects you to the person you lost.
Effects
Everyone experiences grief differently. Most people deal with one or more issues, including problems concentrating, trouble sleeping, the appearance of being apathetic, appetite loss or withdrawal from normal friends and family. Grief may also cause you to feel anger toward God, yourself or even at the person who died. A sense of guilt may overtake people who grieve. Loneliness, numbness, irritability and spontaneous sadness with or without tears are typical effects of those who grieve.
Handling Grief
Dealing with grief is a process that takes time and involves giving up some of the need to be in control, according to the University of Washington Counseling Center. Look at the process as accepting the finality of death, acknowledging and expressing the feelings from the loss, adjusting to the person's absence and saying goodbye.
Social Support
There are times when it's difficult to find support during the grieving process, particularly with an untimely death, such as when a baby dies, claims the Mayo Clinic. A support group of other parents who have dealt with the same type of grief can be comforting. Gather material on your experience to provide for people who don't understand what you're going through.
Acceptance
Accept the fact that there will be some days that are worse than others. Anniversaries, birthdays and holidays may dredge up memories and make the loss seem more intense. This grief may happen at a certain time every day. Grief often washes over people when they least expect it. Understand that others may not have the same feelings. They may unintentionally say the wrong thing, so try not to take specific words to heart. Thank people for caring, and if you need to talk to someone who understands, call your support group.
Honesty
Don't try to hide your emotions just to keep others from being uncomfortable. You should be able to share your thoughts and feelings with people who are close to you so they can help you deal with your grief. In Sabine Ferran Gerhardt's article on the Single Minded Women website, she recommends not ignoring your feelings for the sake of others. All emotions are normal, so when you feel like crying, laughing or even being angry, go ahead and allow yourself to express these emotions.
