When communication stops, one or both partners start drinking or using drugs, infidelity occurs or a couple just feels strained and constricted in the relationship, marriage counseling can help. Doctors at the Mayo Clinic say that marriage counseling is an action that couples can take to help them resolve conflicts and to heal wounds caused by any number of actions.
Basics
Marriage counseling or couples' therapy takes place when both parties in a relationship visit a psychologist or trained marriage counselor. The counseling office is a safe place, or neutral zone, where grievances can be aired without fear of retaliation. Couples can learn how to communicate and fight fairly in marriage counseling. Typically couples enter the therapeutic environment when they want to stay married and need help figuring out where they may have wavered. The parties are usually still in love and have a strong desire to stay together. Two people who enter counseling committed to working on the relationship have a much better chance of success.
Process
Marriage counseling is typically a short-term investment in the relationship. The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy reports that marital therapy typically is completed in 13 sessions or less. The sessions are solution-focused. A third party often can help the parties see where they are holding a grudge or acting too controlling and keep the therapy on track. Couples often see a therapist to help them following a crisis in their family or they may have more issues that may take longer to resolve. Sessions are typically one hour long and take place once a week. Each person is given the opportunity to talk without interruption. When fights erupt during a counseling session, the therapist usually allows it to play out and then helps the couple analyze the encounter. Each person can learn through this process to see his and her own part in the exchange and make necessary changes.
Counselors
Most marriage counselors have specialized training in couples therapy. Counselors with credentials such as the Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) usually have a master's or doctorate degree and have passed state certification exams. Marriage counseling may be covered by insurance and many therapists work on a sliding scale, allowing patients to pay an amount in line with certain income limits. Most therapists have private practices, although marriage counselors also can be found through social service agencies, clinics and churches. Couples can ask for a referral from friends, doctors and clergy.
