Substance abuse is the continuous and excessive use of illegal drugs or alcohol. For many people, substance abuse is not a choice, but a serious recurring illness that cannot be treated without help. Substance abuse not only damages the addict, but directly and indirectly affects family members as well. According to the HealthyPlace website, a family member who is addicted to drugs or alcohol is at an increased risk for physical abuse, sexual abuse, divorce, mental illness and domestic violence. When addicts seek treatment, the focus of most programs is on the user, with little to no attention paid to the effects the addict's actions have had on members of the family.
Family
When a member of the family is an addict, emotions within the family can run high. The emotions run the gamut of shame, disappointment, frustration, anger and hope, according to HealthyPlace. Family members will obviously hold on to hope that recovery is possible. Each time the substance abuser promises to stop using or actually does stop for a time, hope that recovery may be possible is created. Broken promises and relapses into using again cause anger at the user's behavior and lies. Families can be separated because of a user, with some members of the family being angry and suspicious that the addict will never change and others trusting and believing promises to stop. Rather than properly directing these feelings towards the addict, family members commonly turn on one another with frustration and resentment.
Concerns
Families that are going through substance abuse issues naturally have concerns for the impact the behavior of the user is having on both him or her and the family. There is often anxiety when it comes to the behaviors shown while the addict is under the influence, as well as loss of job or freedom and overall health. The image of the family may also be a concern for some. In an effort to protect the image of the family, a family may deny or hide the behavior of the user because they are ashamed. When this occurs, the user is often enabled to continue down a destructive path for an extended period.
Financial Effects
Substance abuse can have a major financial impact on a family. According to Helpguide.org, having no money to support, clothe or feed the children, potential legal and medical costs and the possible loss of home are all concerns of the addict and his or her family. Members of the family frequently become accomplices without realizing it when they are asked for money by the addict.
Addicted Parents
When an addict is also a parent, the impact felt by the children is immeasurable. In these situations, many children are forced to assume responsibilities that should be handled by adults. The children may also lash out and give up on schoolwork and other activities. Many parents may treat their children in a different manner depending on if they are sober or intoxicated. According to COAF.org, children may feel insecure or become confused by the unclear communications, chaos, unpredictable behavior and mood swings. Children who have a parent with a substance abuse problem may become withdrawn, suicidal, anxious or depressed. They may attempt to hide the fact that their parents are addicts, have a fear of failing, have problems with self-esteem and find it difficult to bond with others. At times, children may feel they are to blame for their parents’ actions.
Decisions
It can be draining emotionally and physically exhausting when dealing with issues related to substance abuse. As much as they try, members of the family simply are not able to force someone to cease their activities. Helpguide.org states if the user wants to stop, it will be his or her choice alone that makes it happen. The best thing members of the family can do is make choices for themselves that are positive and encourage their loved ones to seek help.
