According to an article in Women’s Web, leaving an abusive relationship might be a positive step, but it’s also a difficult one. While walking out requires strength and determination, letting go of the past and working on building a new future will take a lot of work.
Step 1
Seek help. If you have children, a lawyer can help you sort out child support issues without your involvement. This is a good option if things are tense or if you still have feelings for your ex. A counselor, a women’s shelter or even somebody from your local church can provide emotional support when family and friends are not available.
Step 2
Focus on getting better. Women’s Web points out that transitioning into a self-sufficient role might be difficult after being abused and made to feel like you’re not good enough. Therapy might be necessary for you to regain independence and learn how to function again.
Step 3
Allow yourself time to grieve, experience anger and euphoria. These are all normal stages of moving on from any relationship, and they are particularly strong when you’re coming out of an abusive partnership. Feelings sometimes change from one extreme to another in a question of minutes. Learn to recognize them and deal with them productively by putting your energy into change and growth, rather than revenge.
Step 4
Maintain your distance. According to clinical psychologist Tara J. Palmatier, you need to maintain a “no contact policy” and resist the temptation of “trying to be friends.” While you’re still mourning the end of the relationship and trying to move on, contact will only make things more difficult. Focus on helping yourself.
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