Communication is an essential part of human interaction. You can't deal effectively with other people if you do not interpret correctly what they are saying and give them a clear message when you speak. Communication skills can be improved easily because plenty of resources are available to teach you what to do. You have daily opportunities for practice.
Step 1
Make a list of the weak points in your speaking and listening skills. For example, you might get nervous when speaking to groups of people or have trouble thinking of the right words when you are having a conversation. You might habitually interrupt others or misinterpret their meaning. Write down all these points.
Step 2
Write down improvement ideas for each point. For example, if you are nervous speaking in front of groups, your idea might be taking a speech class at your local community college or joining the Toastmasters International speaking club. If you tend to interrupt others, wear a rubber band and flick it every time you have the urge to break in when someone else is speaking. If you tend to misinterpret things, summarize what you think the other person said and ask for any necessary corrections. This is called "reflection," according to Dr. Scott Williams, an instructor at the Raj Soin College of Business at Wright State University in Ohio.
Step 3
Implement your list of ideas whenever you have an opportunity. Most people communicate throughout the day with family members, co-workers, classmates, neighbors, friends and strangers. Every interaction represents a practice opportunity. Volunteer to give a presentation at work or a social club as you progress through your speech class if you need to get comfortable communicating with groups. Toastmasters International recommends plenty of practice before the presentation.
Step 4
Ask your friends and family to hold you accountable when you are not using good speaking or listening skills. For example, you can tell a friend, "I'm trying to improve my listening skills. Please call it to my attention if I interrupt you, or I don't seem to be paying attention." Promise your spouse you will listen during arguments and give him a chance to correct you before you speak. Ask him to tell you if you are not being clear or staying on topic when you talk.
Step 5
Write in a communication journal every night. Make a note of your practice efforts, including things that went well and areas where you need more improvement. Use the notes to create your speaking and listening practice plan for the next day.
Tips and Warnings
- Consult outside resources if you can't think of any ideas on your own to address your speaking and listening challenges. There are many excellent communication books, and you may be able to find a local seminar. A life coach or counselor who does brief therapy can help you create an action plan in only one or two sessions.
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