Self-assured children can adapt to new environments and situations without self-doubt or anxiety. A healthy sense of self-esteem can also enable children to bounce back from disappointment, make the right decisions and deflect peer pressure with ease. Children develop self-confidence as they learn to believe in their own abilities and instincts. Use techniques that help you boost your child’s self-esteem and encourage him to become a self-sufficient young adult.
Step 1
Give your child unconditional support. A child who knows that you will love her regardless of her mistakes or failures will gain the confidence to try different activities or make decisions independently.
Step 2
Encourage your child to participate in an extracurricular activity that interests him. Children who work toward a goal, learn a new skill or function as part of a team will feel confident in their own abilities. If your child is interested in sports, for example, help him by finding opportunities to join a team or take lessons, buying or renting the necessary equipment and attending practices and games to show your support.
Step 3
Let your child make mistakes and discover ways to solve problems on her own. Kids Health from Nemours notes that although you should support and encourage your child, it’s important to be patient and avoid intervening immediately if she struggles with a new skill. If you consistently take over and help your child or correct her technique as she learns to tie her shoes, for instance, you’ll undermine her self-confidence because she’ll think that she can’t do it without your assistance.
Step 4
Praise your child for successes or for a good effort. Praise specifics instead of simply offering a broad compliment. Mention an accomplishment, such as “You made a great throw to third” or “Thank you for showing your sister how to make her bed” to make your child feel appreciated, as opposed to saying “You’re the best athlete on your team” or “You’re the greatest brother,” which can cause anxiety as your child attempts to live up to those expectations.
Step 5
Set a good example so your child can emulate your confident behavior. You’ll be a positive role model if you’re self-assured around others and show that you’re confident in your strengths and decisions without being egotistical.
Tips and Warnings
- Help your child practice confident behavior by role-playing so she can experiment with different responses if she struggles with self-confidence in public. Have your child rehearse what she’d stay when standing up to a bully or dealing with peer pressure, for instance.
- Consult a physician or school psychologist if your child’s lack of self-confidence lapses into feelings of worthlessness or depression. A mental health professional can discover the root of the problem and work with your child to find the best treatment method.
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