Some relationships feel like they have no end--not because of great love, but because fear, manipulation and intimidation make one partner feel unable or afraid to leave. Abuse, be it mental, physical or sexual, is never your fault and it's not likely to go away by simply working on your relationship or trying harder. You may feel like it's impossible to leave, but with the help of a support system and some careful planning, you can leave your abuser and start over.
Step 1
Tell someone about your abuse. Tell your doctor, your spiritual leader, a friend or anyone you trust about your abuse.
Step 2
Gather together your support system. Even if you are isolated from your family and friends, you can still find community support. Call women's centers and agencies that specialize in helping women safely escape their abusers.
Step 3
Work with a professional to develop a safety plan, recommends MayoClinic.com. Decide what factors might make it difficult for you to leave your abuser and address each one in your plan. Include where you will stay, how you will get there and the numbers of several emergency contacts.
Step 4
Pack a bag with your most important belongings, including your children's birth records, your financial information, clothes and toiletries. Leave it at the place where you intend to stay when you leave your abuser so you can get away in an emergency situation.
Step 5
Put your safety plan into action. Call the police or your domestic violence advocate if you don't feel safe leaving or if your partner threatens you in any way. Never try to confront your abuser, for your own safety.
Step 6
Consider seeing a counselor. Abusers aim to control their partners. They use manipulation, threats and violence to diminish their victim's self-esteem, according to HelpGuide.org. On top of that, you may be dealing with some grief, fear or sadness involving your changed life. A counselor can help you work through those feelings.
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