Spousal abuse crosses all ethnic, religious and economic boundaries. It occurs in both heterosexual and same-sex partnerships, and victimizes both men and women. Intimate partner abuse can scar both body and mind, regardless of whether it is physical, sexual or emotional in nature. While the occurrence of physical and sexual abuse may be evident to the victim, he or she may find mental abuse much more difficult to identify.
Definition
A mentally or emotionally abusive spouse uses non-physical aggression to control a partner. Over time, the abuser's attempts to verbally frighten, humiliate and isolate the victim erode her self-esteem and cause her to doubt her own judgment. With the victim's will broken, the abuser can easily dominate and manipulate her. Mental abuse often progresses in severity over time, and can occur independently from or in addition to physical and sexual abuse. It can be a precursor to other forms of violence, as well.
Examples
Mentally abusive behavior includes verbal attacks or demeaning insults, as well as threats of violence to you, your loved ones or pets. The abuser may control your movement through financial means by withholding money, sabotaging your career or preventing you from having one. He may prevent you from spending time with family or friends, and may require you to ask permission to leave the house. He may seek to intimidate you by destroying your property or prominently displaying weapons. If you express hurt, he may deny or minimize his behavior by accusing you of being too sensitive.
Characteristics of an Abuser
Certain personality traits can serve as warning signs that someone is potentially abusive. While the person may not exhibit all of these characteristics, the presence of some of these traits indicates trouble. A potential abuser will likely have a poor self-image with a constant need for reassurance. He expresses all unpleasant emotions--like sadness or fear--through anger. He is extremely jealous in romantic relationships and may think of his partner as a possession. An abuser may also have experienced abuse as a child or witnessed the abuse of his mother.
Effects on the Victim
Although the victims of mental abuse are not physically harmed, they do endure significant damage. In 2002, Dr. Ann Coker from the University of Texas School of Public Health analyzed the responses of 16,000 American men and women who were surveyed about their abuse history and current health. Those who had experienced psychological abuse were more likely to suffer from chronic physical and mental illnesses and to develop addictions to drugs or alcohol. Coker said her findings reinforce the need for clinicians to "extend screening to include physical and sexual abuse, as well as psychological abuse," so early intervention can prevent future health problems.
France Outlaws Psychological Abuse
In June 2010, France became the first country to outlaw psychological abuse between intimate partners. The French bill, which won support from both left- and right-wing lawmakers, defines psychological abuse as "repeated acts which could be constituted by words or other machinations, to degrade one's quality of life and cause a change to one's mental or physical state." Anyone found guilty of the charge is subject to up to three years in jail and a $91,530 fine.
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