How To Boost Self-confidence In Children

Self-confidence is neither conceit nor inflated ego. It is simply an accurate yet positive perception of oneself and one's capabilities. Children with self-confidence are optimistic and enthusiastic about learning and trying new activities. They are less likely to be bullied or to bully others. They are better able to cope with disappointments and criticism, and less likely to use put-downs or insults against others or themselves. Parents, teachers and others who work closely with children can greatly affect their self-confidence and self-esteem.

Step 1

Improve your own self-confidence. According to pediatrician and author Dr. William Sears, parents act as mirrors to their children. If your child watches you put yourself down or show insecurity about your abilities, he may begin to mimic your emotions and actions. Likewise, he will take note that you have a positive self-image. Think and speak in a positive manner about yourself. Become more assertive and change things about which you are unhappy, if possible. Learn to laugh at your mistakes.

Step 2

Demonstrate your view of your child's worth. You work hard to ensure that your child has everything she needs, and you do so because you love her. Doing so can leave you spread thin and exhausted. However, you must make time to show your child how special she is to you. Say "I love you" frequently. Dole out hugs, kisses and pats on the back generously. Make time to ask about her day and actively listen to her responses. Get down on the floor and play together. When she sees that you care enough to make time for her, her self-confidence will grow.

Step 3

Praise the child for accomplishments and positive behaviors. According to a report by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, parents should pour on praise when appropriate. Applaud positive choices and character traits. Commend your child when he tries something new or helps without prompting. Allow your child to hear you praising him to someone else, especially when he believes you do not realize he is listening.

Step 4

Criticize the child in a healthy, constructive manner. Along with praise for positive actions, children need to be corrected when they behave inappropriately. Be sure to criticize the action and not your child. Never belittle her or embarrass her. Turn the criticism into a learning experience by explaining why your child needs to change the behavior or trait and what consequences may come from continuing it.

Step 5

Foster independence. Encourage your child to try new things and overcome his fears. Give him age-appropriate responsibilities at home. Allow him to make decisions for himself when possible, such as what to wear to school or the topic for a school report. He will learn to feel confident in his decision-making skills and abilities. When he is faced with peer pressure, he will feel confident making decisions for himself, rather than simply following the crowd.