Your sister and her children are family, and sometimes, when your niece or nephew is behaving in an unruly or unsafe way, you might feel compelled to step in. It's important to remember, however, that no matter how close the family ties, your sister's child is not your own, and attempting to discipline her could create an awkward situation. According to "Parents" magazine, you can find tactful ways to correct your sister's child without offending anyone.
Step 1
Focus on correcting, not punishing. When you're dealing with your sister's or anyone else's child, place your emphasis on handling and correcting the problematic behavior, not doling out punishment, says educational psychologist Michele Borba as cited in "Working Mother" magazine. This means refraining from yelling, imposing judgment, or placing your sister's child in "timeout."
Step 2
Avoid disciplining your sister's child if she is there to do so. Any time a child's mother is there to handle matters, it's not your job to supersede her authority, Borba says in "Working Mother" magazine. The exception would be if the child is in harm's way or involved in physical conflict with your child. In that case, redirect the child in a gentle voice. If your sister's child is fighting with your child, calmly correct both children rather than singling out your niece or nephew.
Step 3
Tell your sister about any situations of misbehavior or discipline. If you have been babysitting your sister's child, for example, be sure to fill her in later about what occurred. Simply say "We had an issue with kicking today, so I explained our rules again." As long as you remained calm and gently enforced reasonable boundaries, your sister is unlikely to mind.
Step 4
When your sister's child comes to play at your house, clearly explain your house rules. Be sure your own child is clear on this as well, Borba says in "Working Mother". Your sister may have different rules at her house, and you should not interfere with those rules except when a child is in physical harm. In your house, however, your sister's child will need to cooperate and follow your rules. By reminding your own child of the rules, you empower your child to set an example for her cousin.
