In college, you can make friendships that last a lifetime. But it can be challenging to make friends in a new environment, especially if you struggle with meeting new people. To make new friends, you have to take risks and open yourself up to the possibility of rejection. But making the effort can pay big dividends. In addition to having people to hang around with, making friends can increase your level of happiness, reduce stress and decrease your risk of developing mental health problems such as anxiety and depression, according to the Mayo Clinic website.
Step 1
Increase your self-esteem, so you'll feel confident when meeting new people. If you suffer from a low self-esteem, it is hard for you to take the necessary risks to make new friends. Young adults who have a low self-esteem often think negatively and put themselves down. According to the Mayo Clinic, when you realize you're having negative thoughts, you should challenge those thoughts and change your thinking. For instance, use hopeful statements such as, "Even though meeting new people seems scary, I have done it before, and I can do it again."
Step 2
Brainstorm a list of at least five things that you enjoy doing, such as playing basketball, painting, reading, walking your dog and yoga. Figure out ways that you can do the things you enjoy with other people. For instance, you could join an intramural basketball league, take a painting class, join a book club or volunteer at the local animal shelter.
Step 3
Make an effort to do at least one thing from your list each week. Your classes and studying should come first, but you should be able to squeeze in at least a couple hours in which you focus on meeting new people each week.
Step 4
Introduce yourself to new people right away. For example, if you take a painting class, introduce yourself to the other students, and tell them that it's your first day. Ask them what the instructor is like, and invite the person you feel the most comfortable around to grab a cup of tea or coffee after class.
Step 5
Pick one person from one of your regular classes, and start a conversation with that person a couple minutes before or directly after your next class. For example, you could ask the person a question about something that confused you during the lecture, see if the person wants to get lunch or dinner with you, or set up a study session for the next test.
Tips and Warnings
- Not everyone will respond as you want them to. If someone passes on your invitation to get a cup of coffee, try again with someone else. Don't let one rejection deter you from trying again. If you continue to have trouble making friends, consider going to your college counseling center. The counselors can help students deal with social anxiety and improve social skills.
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