How to Cope With the Death of a Spouse

Overview

The loss of a spouse is one of the most difficult experiences that you will ever go through. You may feel overwhelmed by feelings of grief. Your emotions may rotate through feelings of denial, shock, anger, guilt and total despair. It may seem that these feelings will never go away. While it is true that you will always miss your spouse, the feelings of grief will soften and you will once again enjoy your life. With patience, time and support from those that you love, you can get through this emotional time in your life.

Step 1

Accept that it is okay to feel sad about the loss of your spouse, angry that your spouse is gone, guilty for being alive or to feel relief that your loved one is no longer suffering. These are all normal feelings of grief. Allow yourself to feel and remind yourself that with time, your grief will become easier to bear.

Step 2

Comfort yourself with the promises of your religious beliefs, if you are religious. For example, some religions promise that believers will reunite with their loved ones in heaven. Read your religious books and seek guidance from your religious leaders. If you believe in prayer, then pray. Prayer and communication with God is a healing experience for those who believe in it.

Step 3

Share your feelings with friends and family. Openly expressing your feelings of grief can help you to heal.

Step 4

Ask friends and family for help when you need it. You may find it hard to complete normal daily tasks while you are grieving. Maybe you do not know how to do some of the household chores that your spouse normally completed. Do not expect others to realize that you need help. Let loved ones know when you need assistance.

Step 5

Seek help from a counselor or attend a support group. A counselor can give you the tools to cope with your emotions. At a support group, you will receive counseling among others who are experiencing grief from the lost of a loved one. Knowing that you are not alone in your feelings can be comforting.

Step 6

Care for your body. Remember to eat right, take your medications, exercise, groom yourself and attend your regular doctor appointments. It is too easy to forget about your own needs and give up on life. This will only make you fall into a deeper depression. You are still alive and your spouse would want you to be happy and healthy.

Step 7

Remember that your loved ones are also suffering and need your support. Your children and grandchildren still need you. Let them know that you are there for them. You may even find that by supporting your loved ones, you are actually helping yourself heal.

Step 8

Visit your doctor if depression or anxiety is interfering with your ability to function in daily life. Your doctor can prescribe you antidepressants or anti-anxiety medications to help through this difficult time in your life.

Step 9

Allow yourself to experience life and be happy. When you feel guilty for enjoying your life, remind yourself that your spouse would want you to be happy. See a movie with friends, go on a vacation with family or get involved in a community activity.