When you're in a relationship with a woman who lies, it's often hard to know when she's lying and when she's telling the truth. Liars often exhibit certain body tics and behaviors that let you know they are being deceitful, so with careful observation you have a better chance of telling when a woman is lying. However, sometimes a person's fear of not being believed when telling the truth can mimic the attributes of someone who is really lying.
Step 1
Establish a baseline for a person's usual behavior, recommends U.S. News & World Report senior analyst Ulrich Boser. You should know what her usual behavior is and how she typically acts when she's being truthful so you might be able to recognize the subtle differences in her behavior when she's lying.
Step 2
Ask for particulars in her story. If she tells you she had to work late at night to explain her absence, ask what project she was working on and who she was working with. Ask in a casual way so she doesn't feel attacked or interrogated. Think of natural questions to ask to see whether she has the right answers and details to back up her story.
Step 3
Watch her body language. A liar will exhibit certain signs of lying, often subconsciously. For instance, in her book "Reading People: How to Understand People and Predict Their Behavior -- Anytime, Anyplace," jury consultant Jo-Ellan Dimitrius notes that a biting of the lip, turning away or fidgeting can all be subtle hints that a woman isn't being entirely truthful. Watch her hands. She might wring them or drum them nervously as she fears being discovered.
Step 4
Look into her eyes when she tells you a story. A liar often avoids eye contact, as they feel ashamed and don't want you looking in their eyes. If you do catch her eye, look for dilation, which is often another sign of lying.
Step 5
Ask for the story again soon after she tells you. Forbes notes that a liar often tells different versions of the same story or leaves out particulars because the story was made up on the spot and she might not remember what she's already told you. Ask her to tell the story and compare her version against the details she already gave you.
References
- "U.S. News & World Report;" 3 Ways to Tell if Someone Is Lying
- "Reading People: How to Understand People and Predict Their Behavior -- Anytime, Anyplace"; Jo-Ellan Dimitrius; 2008
- Forbes: 10 Ways To Tell If Someone Is Lying To You
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