Your friend gets your sense of humor, knows when you're having a bad day and is easy to be around whether you're out on an adventure or hanging out at home. These qualities make her an ideal friend--but if you find her attractive, that little spark might make you think she'd be a great girlfriend, too. Making the transition from friends to romance can be tricky, especially if you're not sure your friend feels the same way. You can let her know you're interested by being bold and direct or by making your message more subtle.
Direct Approach
Step 1
Choose a time to talk when you know you have an open-ended get-together. Don't pick a time when one of you has to be somewhere else at a specific time.
Step 2
Tell her that she's a terrific friend and that you're starting to feel interested in her in a romantic way. Taking the direct approach ensures that there won't be any confusion, says Beverly Hills relationship expert Gary Stollman on Match.com.
Step 3
Explain that her friendship is important to you and you don't want anything to interfere with it. With that in mind, discuss with her any expectations that either of you might have from furthering your relationship.
Step 4
Ask her if she'd be willing to go on a date with you to see if there's a spark for her, too, and accept her answer. Even if you do not get your desired results, "you can stop torturing yourself with what if thoughts," notes Match.com.
Low-Key Approach
Step 1
Make a plan to go out with a couple who are romantically involved. If you're not sure how your friend feels about you, setting up a mock double date is a good way to get her thinking about you as a date and not just as friend, says Stollman.
Step 2
Talk about relationships with your friend in a casual way. Ask her what attracts her to someone or what kind of qualities she looks for in a romantic partner. If she's interested in you, you might recognize yourself in her answers.
Step 3
Make a joke about how you'd be the perfect couple if you started dating, and pay attention to your friend's response. It may help you tell whether she's interested.
Step 4
Tell her that sometimes you think your relationship has the potential to be more than a friendship and you want to explore that possibility. Ask her if she'd be interested in testing the relationship waters by going on a date with you.
Tips and Warnings
- Consider whether you're willing to risk your friendship for a romantic encounter, advises Stollman. Changing the dynamics of your relationship will permanently affect your friendship--for better or worse.
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