Adults who are able to show up to work on time, pay their bills, clean their houses, mow their lawns and take care of their children are considered responsible people. Children who are taught responsibility are given the tools to become responsible adults. Parenting using the Love and Logic approach is a way to teach your children. This approach involves leading with empathy, using enforceable statements, providing your children with choices, as well as having anticipatory and delayed consequences.
Step 1
Set a good example for your child by being responsible. Parents are a child's biggest and first influence in life, so you have an opportunity to teach children how to behave by becoming a positive role model. Do this by having your child present when you perform activities such as grocery shopping, mowing the grass, and cleaning your home. When your child sees you doing chores that benefit your family, this will leave an impression on her that cleaning and responsibilities need to be accomplished in life.
Step 2
Talk to your children about the benefits of being a responsible person. Explain how the things they value are connected to you taking a responsible role in life. Their toys and their home would not be theirs if you or your spouse were not responsible people who are willing to go to work and maintain a clean environment for them to live and play in.(see Reference 3)
Step 3
Make your children take care of their possessions and their rooms as soon as they are able to understand and follow directions. Toddlers are able to assist you in picking up their toys and, from the age of four, your child can assist you in making his bed.
Step 4
Buy your child a pet and make the care for that pet your child's responsibility. The pet should be appropriate to your child's age. It is best to start with a fish for younger children and consider a guinea pig or amphibian for older children. These types of pets are not overwhelming and do not demand much more attention than cleaning the tank/cage and feeding them every day.(see Reference 1)
Step 5
Use chores around the house as a time to spend together and praise your children often. Do not pay your children for what they do with money. Teach them that responsibilities are just that--responsibilities. Chores don't follow with monetary gain for adults so your children should not come to expect to be paid for chores they perform in a house that they live in.
