Whether at home or in the workplace, conflict has a way of poisoning relationships when it isn't properly dealt with. When you avoid conflict, you may keep the peace momentarily, but defer the anger, hurt feelings and egos to another time when they could explode. To dismantle the ticking time bomb that is conflict, you must meet it head-on and talk with those involved. Through confronting conflict, you may endure some difficult discussions, but you'll also diffuse the situation to create solutions for the benefit of everyone involved.
Step 1
Take a moment to cool down and collect yourself. Wait until any anger or harsh feelings subside before you confront the conflict, suggests University of Arkansas. While you shouldn't allow conflict to fester, trying to resolve a problem when you're feeling hotheaded and upset will only yield arguments and hurt feelings.
Step 2
Write a few key points down and go over them before you call a meeting so you know the topics you'd like to cover and can stay in control of the situation. Gather your thoughts and arguments so you're ready with answers to questions and solutions that you've brainstormed. Preparation goes a long way in having an organized and mutually beneficial conversation with someone concerning a conflict.
Step 3
Use language that takes responsibility for the conflict to reduce the defensive attitude you receive from the other person, suggests the Raj Soin School of Business at Wright State University. Instead of using accusatory statements, like "You didn't perform well," try using "I" statements to show that you assume responsibility, like "I wasn't clear in my directions."
Step 4
Separate the person from the behavior and avoid making the argument personal, warns business web site MindTools.com. Focus on the task at hand without personally attacking the other person's character. Instead of suggesting that your wife doesn't care about you because she doesn't call when she'll be late, focus on the conflict of scheduling. When you become too personal, the other person could shut down and be less open to conflict resolution.
Step 5
Seek constructive conflict resolution that satisfies all parties involved. Ask for ideas while supplying some of your own. Together, choose a solution or brainstorm a new solution for the mutual benefit of everyone involved. While not everyone will get what they want, conflict resolution can ensure that everyone is satisfied and can live with the new solution.
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