Dealing with children as a parent or babysitter can be difficult if you do not know how to manage behavior. All children, no matter how difficult they seem to be, crave direction from the person or persons in charge of them. Learning specific techniques to deal with children can turn a dreadful experience into a delightful one.
Step 1
Provide specific directions. Tell the child what you do and do not want him to do. For example, if you want a child to sit a certain way, say "Sit down on the carpet next to the big chair (point to the spot for a visual clue), with your legs folded, and your hands folded (show the folded hands to them) in your lap. Do not leave that position until I tell you to do so." Then get confirmation that the child understands the directions by asking him if he does.
Step 2
Identify the type of behavior the child is engaging in. Children can exhibit aggressive or bullying behavior, be a tattletale or show a lack of motivation to complete simple tasks. The behavior depends on what type of management technique is applied.
Step 3
Offer positive comments even when disciplining a child for inappropriate behavior. Acknowledge the type of behavior the child did wrong, and give a consequence for that behavior. But always end positively by saying how the child can change her behavior and that you know she is capable of doing the right thing. For example, if a child exhibits aggressive behavior, identify the language or physical contact that the child is engaging in that is wrong. Explain such behavior to the child clearly and calmly. For instance, If she is hitting other people, tell her that touching another person without his permission with the intent to hurt that person is wrong. Explain the consequence for that action, which could be sitting in a separate part of the room. End with the positive reinforcement that you know she is capable of keeping her hands off of other people. When the child comes back, she can start by apologizing to the person she hit and begin with a clean slate.
Step 4
Enforce rules consistently. Do not punish behavior one day and let it go the next day. Be fair and do not punish one child more than another for the same behavior.
Step 5
Spend quality time with the child, getting to know his likes and dislikes. Ask the child open-ended questions that do not require a yes or no answer to get to know him. Such questions include "What makes you angry?" or "What do you like to do for fun?" These simple questions that any child can answer gives you insight into that child's mind-set.
Tips and Warnings
- Do not scream at children. Remain calm when applying any of these techniques. If bad behavior continues, consult a medical professional.
