Divorce is most often a painful process for the two parties involved, but when there are children in the picture, it can get even uglier. Helping kids cope with divorce is essential to helping them understand that when parents separate, it's not their fault. Some effects of divorce can last with kids for years, making it essential to talk to them and help them work through their feelings.
Step 1
Help kids understand that divorce is never their fault. Sometimes moms and dads just don't see eye to eye and it's best to change the situation, but that doesn't mean kids are to blame.
Step 2
Explain to your child or children that they can't fix the situation. Sometimes kids think if they can get their parents back together, everything will be fine again.
Step 3
Talk with your children about how things are going to change so they understand and are prepared to deal with it. Explain the new living situation. Let them know who is going to be where and how you'll arrange visits and time together.
Step 4
Seek counseling for your child if you think he may be suffering from depression, anxiety or stress because of the divorce.
Step 5
Avoid putting undue emotional stress on your children by going to them for emotional comfort in the midst of your divorce. Kids are the ones who need comfort from you, not the other way around. Also, avoid pumping them for information about what your ex-spouse is doing or saying. Doing so just puts them in the middle.
Step 6
Understand that kids are going to have a wide range of emotions during this difficult time. It's okay for them to express anger, frustration, hurt and sadness, and to pull away from you emotionally for a period of time as they deal with the new realities of their family. Allow them some emotional space.
