Talking to a loved one about his drinking problem may be one of the hardest things you'll ever have to do, but it's also one of the most important. According to the Hazelden Foundation, alcoholics often deny their drinking problem to the point of endangering their lives. Your loved one may be initially upset with you for broaching this uncomfortable subject, but in the long run, it's more important for you to intervene in this self-destructive habit.
Step 1
Time your conversation to follow a bad drinking episode. The Hazelden foundation suggests having the talk with your loved one after he has had a bad experience related to his drinking. Coming on the heels of an unpleasant occurrence, your message is more likely to resonate with your loved one. The bad experience could range from a drunk driving arrest to an embarrassing display of drunkenness in front of family.
Step 2
Discuss specific issues. According to the National Institutes of Health, you should talk to your loved one about the specific ways in which his drinking problem has interfered with his quality of life. Cite deteriorating relationships, job performance problems, health issues you have noticed. Refrain from talking about these issues in a judgmental way; rather, discuss them in terms of your concern for your loved one.
Step 3
Speak calmly, even in the face of anger from your loved one. The Hazelden Foundation says that due to the intensity of denial in many alcoholics, defensiveness and anger are common reactions. Your loved one may say unkind things or tell you to stay out of his business. Try not to take this personally, as it is not really about you. With time, your loved one will probably calm down and see things differently.
Step 4
Offer support and help. In addition to offering your emotional support to your loved one, you should also be prepared to refer him to a local Alcoholics Anonymous meeting or treatment facility, the Hazelden Foundation reports. You should also offer to go with him to the meeting or treatment center to lend your support.
