The death of a spouse is the most stressful event you can experience, according to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale. If you've recently lost your wife, it can be extremely difficult to know how to put the pieces of your life back together. You may feel many different emotions, including anger, sadness, anxiety or fear. Many people feel guilty for being the one to survive, according to the National Institute on Aging. Realize that there is no right way to feel or to deal with grief. You need to process it in a way that is natural for you.
Step 1
Talk about your feelings with a friend or family member. It's common for men to bottle up their feelings. But by denying your feelings, you prolong the grief process. The feelings will come out in one way or another eventually. Sometimes, people who keep their feelings bottled up become physically or mentally ill. It's OK to cry, get angry or feel scared. Talking to a friend can give you support and help you to process these feelings.
Step 2
Join a bereavement support group. Support groups can help you develop coping skills and provide support and education about the grief process, according to Hospice Care of Boulder and Broomfield Counties in Colorado. Hearing the stories of others who have experienced loss may make you feel less isolated.
Step 3
Take care of yourself by eating right and getting enough exercise. According to Hospice Care of Boulder and Broomfield Counties, many people who are grieving neglect their own basic needs, increasing the chance of illness. Eat healthy, well-balanced meals and get a bit of exercise each day. Don't be tempted to overindulge in alcohol, drugs or other unhealthy means of escape.
Step 4
Spend time in nature at least once a day if possible. Go to a park, the beach or any other peaceful natural setting. You may find it a peaceful and helpful setting to mentally talk to your wife, pray or meditate. You don't have to do anything at all if you don't want to. You can just sit on a bench and stare at the scenery if you feel like it.
Step 5
Consider seeing a counselor. It's not uncommon to experience depression or anxiety after such a traumatic loss. Some people find it helpful to talk to a counselor about their emotions, even if it's just short-term therapy, according to the National Institute on Aging.
Step 6
Get help with the household chores. If your wife was responsible for taking care of your children, cooking and cleaning, you may feel at a complete loss as to how to go about these tasks. You will learn these chores over time. In the meantime, hire someone if you can or ask a friend or family member for assistance. Many chores can be put on hold, according to the American Hospice Foundation.
