Children often are adorable; their naive and carefree nature is reassurance that goodness is alive and well in the world. However, the same naiveté also makes them difficult to control. They aren't necessarily concerned with your logical arguments because all that exists is their wants and needs. Through rigid non-response, you can counteract the whining to get them on their way to being well-mannered children.
Step 1
Give your child an opportunity to reason with you. Let him know you will listen only if he stops yelling. Through repetition, he will come to understand that calmly defending his position is the way to get your attention.
Step 2
Show your child that complaining will not elicit a response. While asking your child to do her chores may result in groans and yelling, you should always remain calm. Teach her that shouting is pointless because you'll ignore her until she behaves.
Step 3
State your answer to your child's request only once. If you continue to reason with your child, he'll think he can wear you down by constantly asking for what he wants. Eventually, he'll learn not to bother asking again because he isn't going to get an answer.
Step 4
Present your side of the argument when giving your answer. Your child may not immediately understand why she isn't getting her way, but continue to provide her with explanations--they'll help her understand her boundaries as she matures. Once you clearly provide your reasoning, let your child digest it.
Step 5
Acknowledge your child's good behavior consistently. You're creating an understanding in your child's head--complaining results in the silent treatment while good behavior results in affection. Make the acknowledgments physical; head pats, hugs, high-fives and spinning him around playfully are good reinforcements.
