Family abuse can take on many forms. Emotional, verbal, sexual and physical or any combination--are all forms of family abuse. If you are in an abusive relationship with a family member, methods of escape will vary, according to the individual situation.
Step 1
Name the abuser in your mind to be the uncle, father or whomever he is. Once you do this, it will allow you to say, "I am being abused by my uncle," should you have to report the abuse.
Step 2
Write down all of the abuse that has happened to you. If the abuse has been physical, emotional, sexual or verbal, making a list of the abuse is always helpful should you have to take the abuser to court.
Step 3
Talk to a trusted friend, coworker or pastor to let her know that you are being abused and that you are making plans to leave. Often, leaving is the most dangerous step in escaping abuse, so make sure that this person is trustworthy and loyal to you and that she understands the safety involved in keeping quiet about your leaving the abusive relationship. There are also many trusted community action programs involved with helping those experiencing family abuse, so do not be afraid to ask for help from them. Safety for you and your children is the issue.
Step 4
Plan your escape. If children are involved, make sure that they are protected. Answer the questions where, how, what, when and why you are leaving when writing out your plans. Where will you live, how will you survive, what financial means do you have of making it? When will you leave? Is there a shelter around who is willing and able to help you leave safely? Are there schools nearby for your children if they are of school age?
Step 5
Talk to your children about your plan of action to leave the abusive environment. If they are of an age where they can understand, explain to them that it is best to leave for safety reasons. Also, explain to your children to remain quiet about your plans. Inform them of the danger involved if they let the abuser know that you are planning to leave.
Step 6
Set a goal date or time as to when you will actually put your plan in action. The faster you escape the abuse, the better off you and your children will be. Stick to your plan. The longer you stay, the longer the abuse will continue. Remember that the abuse is an attempt to gain and maintain control and power over you.
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