Victims of domestic violence often cannot escape their situation safely without help, and may need considerable assistance to recover after leaving their abuser. In deciding to help domestic-abuse victims, you can significantly improve someone’s life, and possibly save it. Remember, many victims are isolated and controlled to the point where the prospect of leaving their abuser seems impossible.
Step 1
Understand the victim’s situation. Avoid misconceptions about domestic abuse. Don’t express frustration if the victim seems unwilling to leave her abusive partner. She may think she deserves to be abused, or may be frightened of what the abuser will do if she leaves. Victims of abuse are in the most danger when they try to leave, according to DomesticViolence.org, so her fears are legitimate. Help the victim prepare to leave without pressuring her to escape before she‘s ready.
Step 2
Gather resources to help the victim develop a safety plan, and keep them at your home or someplace safe. If the abuser knows his partner is looking for help, it can increase the risk of violence, says the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. Compile information on battered women’s shelters in her area, financial resources in her community, phone numbers for domestic violence hotlines and legal professionals who specialize in domestic violence cases. Offer to keep these resources someplace her abuser can’t find them.
Step 3
Help your friend or loved one prepare to leave. Offer to keep an emergency suitcase of essential items, in case she has to flee. These may include medications, identification and immigration documents, extra sets of car keys, bank books, credit cards, cash, extra clothes, toiletries and medical records, says the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. Make sure she has a planned place to go any time of day or night in an emergency.
Step 4
Be prepared to help your friend in the aftermath of violence. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD, is a common response to violence, according to the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. Symptoms of PTSD include feelings of hopelessness, nightmares, flashbacks, exaggerated startle response or jumpiness, difficulty eating, and engaging in unhealthy or dangerous activities, such as promiscuous sexual activity or alcohol and drug abuse. Help your friend seek assistance from mental health professionals and support groups if you notice symptoms of PTSD.
Tips and Warnings
- Victims may be cut off from any form of communication by their controlling, abusive partners. Giving her a prepaid cell phone can let her call for help if violence escalates.
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