The National Institutes of Health assert that alcoholism is a disease characterized by intense cravings, uncontrollable drinking, increased tolerance and withdrawal symptoms. Abstinence is widely regarded to be the most effective treatment, requiring social support and professional counseling in most cases. Relapse is not inevitable, but is common in the course of the disease. Drinking affects all aspects of the alcoholic's life. Social, financial, legal, and medical problems mount the longer the drinker keeps drinking. Family relationships are apt to suffer most, and may impact future generations.
Misconceptions
Those closest to an alcoholic may feel they are somehow to blame, or that they are inadequate to solve the drinking problem. Not realizing they cannot cure the disease, spouses become obsessed and behave irrationally in efforts to rid the home of alcohol, to monitor the alcoholic, and to make excuses for or cover up the problem. Fear that the alcoholic will hurt themselves or someone else, lose an important job or squander income, drive loved ones to put their own lives on hold.
Effects
The children of an alcoholic at best suffer neglect from having one alcoholic parent and one that is obsessed with alcoholism and has little energy for parenting. At worst, child abuse occurs as a result of mounting anger and violence in the home. An alcoholic father may become sick with fantasies of sexual power and perpetrate games that take the form of colluding with a daughter against the mother. Children who are starved for affection become unwilling partners in such unhealthy triangles. Some become the victims of incest.
Expert Insight
A family dealing with alcoholism lives with unpredictability and secrets. Claudia Black, author of "It Will Never Happen to Me, Growing Up with Addiction as Youngsters, Adolescents, and Adults" explains that children of alcoholics adopt rigid roles to help them cope with chaos. The hero child takes on adult responsibilities and strives for success. The scapegoat misbehaves, taking all the blame. The quiet child's aim is to not be noticed. The mascot uses distraction and often humor. Black states that children in these roles learn not to talk about issues, not to trust anyone, and not to feel feelings, a code of conduct that interferes with the formation of healthy relationships.
Risks
Researchers from Yale University studied over 40,000 adult children of alcoholics and found that the incidence of mental illness is highest among daughters of alcoholic mothers. The study focused on gender to expand on current knowledge that the children of alcoholics are at risk of developing psychiatric disorders. Study results were announced in a July 20, 2010 press release and published by the National Institutes of Health.
Prevention/Solution
Strained relationships may contribute to drinking. However, when those close to the alcoholic detach and begin to live their own lives, the alcoholic may experience the consequences of drinking. The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services states that many alcoholics are helped when a spouse makes treatment a condition of continuing family relationships. Family members benefit from learning about the disease of alcoholism and finding support for themselves.
References
- Medline Plus: Alcoholism
- "It Will Never Happen to Me, Growing Up With Addiction As Youngsters, Adolescents, Adults", Claudia Black, Ph.D., 2002
- NCADI: If Someone Close Has A Problem With Alcohol or Other Drugs
- Medline Plus: Mom's Alcoholism Especially Tough on Daughter's Mental Health
